The last living relative of General George Armstong Custer, a very rich merchant banker, decides upon a visit to Sydney Australia that he wants to build a branch of his hugely successful enterprise, right beside Sydney Harbour. The 80 floor building takes quite some time to complete, given no expense was spared to have it be the most lavish building in the whole city.
Eventually, when the construction was complete, Mr Custer inspected his brand new domain, and decided that the huge foyer was missing something....it was bare, devoid of anything aestetic, artistic or ornamental. This was not to his liking, so he consulted with the architect, who commissioned an artist to paint a huge mural on the wall facing the entrance doors.
The artist, being a temperamental finicky type of guy, insisted that nobody upon nobody can view the work until it is complete in every detail. Mr Custer agrees to the artists terms and arranged for all security measures to ensure his wishes were 100% complied with. The only detail yet to be decided was the subject material, the desired theme...which was the artists next question.
"Well bein' that I be the only livin' relashun of the late, great General George Armstong Custer, an' I wanna bring some of the true American spirit ta Australier, I'll dang well have a purdy mural of Custer's Last Stand."
It was agreed and the artist set himself to work. Many, many months passed and the work seemed to Mr Custer to be taking far too long, so he queried as to why. Being that the wall was 250 feet long by 45 feet high, with many, many intricate details to consider, and only so many hours in a day, Mr Custer accepted it and moved forwards to build and open other branches elsewhere in the world.
Three years later, MR Custer receives a phone call from the finicky artist to say the mural had been completed, that the bank could now be opened as Mr Custer had planned, with the mural as the centrepiece upon entry. Mr Custer was most pleased, and being a very rich, powerful and influential man, official opening invitations were sent to all manner of dignitaries, kings and queens; princes and princesses; presidents and prime ministers; high profilers from all over the world. It was such an auspicious occasion, with champagne, caviar and all manner of delicacies freely available to all the guests.....the unveiling of this mural masterpiece only moments away.
When the security screens were finally removed and a moment of absoute silence, all that could be heard was the sound of cutlery, crockery and glasses hitting the marble floor, sighs, gasps and 'oh my god's' Women were fainting/passing out everywhere, men rushing from all over to cover the eyes of those who hadn't.....and MR Custer was clearly not amused.
The 250 x 45 foot mural was far from expected, for there were hundreds of fish with halos above their heads.....and indians, lots of indians, male and female.....doing things, lots of things. It was clearly pornographic, to say the least, and Mr Custer was far from impressed, considering he has paid 2.2 million for this mural that depicted things that should only ever be done in the privacy of one's bedroom.
"What in the hell do you call this, it's obscene and a disgrace to humanity, up there for all to see. IF you were a man in my uncle's army, hed've had you court martialed, hung, drawn, quartered and shot for such treason. Now, man, explain yourself, why you would give me such an abomination when I specifically asked fer Custer's Last Stand?"
"Well man, I used some artistic license and tried to put myself there, to feel the atmosphere and try to understand what those guys musta been feelin'."
"Yeah, yeah, but how on earth did you come up with this monstrosity?"
Well Man, if I'd've been poor Geoge at the time, I'd have said: "Holy mackerel, look at all them @#&$%*' indians!!!!!"
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