Unfairman

Reply to Nader - prove me wrong in Politics JoeUser Forums

I'll show you a civil thread, Ted! Come over and I'll pound ya!

Reply to Nader - prove me wrong in Politics JoeUser Forums

Hey, guy, back off. I was calling MYSELF an asshole. I thought that was pretty obvious. Also, I realize that the popular vote does not elect the president (which I feel is wrong, but not a whole lot to be done about it in time). My point was that the people did not choose Bush. There was not a whole lot more that the American voters could do to not elect him. I didn't say I didn't like him, nor did I say that nobody liked him. I was

Where's the best place for a tire? in Misc JoeUser Forums

So my friend Seth calls me up at about 10:00 tonight and says "We're going out to Haley's pit. There's gonna be a bonfire out there." I figure, what the hell, I'm not doing anything. Just deciphering "The Da Vinci Code". I'll take a ride out there. So I did. Who's Haley, you may be wondering, and what is his pit? An old ramshackel house? A ditch filled with vipers? No, my friends, Haley's pit is a small gravel pit (it has to

Reply to I won a million dollars! in Misc JoeUser Forums

My back! My neck! My neck AND my back!

Reply to Nader - prove me wrong in Politics JoeUser Forums

[quote="BulbousHead"] but what has he done lately, besides hand Bush the Presidency and now threaten to do it again Alright, this is not the first time I've heard this argument nor will it be the last, but it IS the first time I get to make my point, because usually I hear it on TV and , while I do shout at the TV, it rarely responds. What's your point, asshole? Here it is. Gore WON the popular vote in 2000. It was pretty obv

Reply to Greatest Movies Ever Made in Entertainment JoeUser Forums

"Go away, or I'll call the Brute Squad!" "I'm on the Brute Squad" "You ARE the Brute Squad" "Bye boys! Have fun storming the castle!" "Y'think it'll work?" "It would take a miracle." That's the movie I say when peole ask me what my favorite movie is. Trivia: my college "Intro to Film" teacher was considered for the part of Westley, but his meeting with Rob Reiner didn't go well.

Battle Cry in Misc JoeUser Forums

I just rewrote this poem, from the skeleton of one I wrote in High School. I liked the message, but my writing skills were pretty shoddy back then, and it didn't flow for shit, so I rewrote it. I thought it was kind of fitting, considering out current situation. It's called Battle Cry Battle Cry I sit in shock up on the hill We've won the battle, yet I feel no thrill As my newfound brother lay before me, silent... Never to

Reply to Class Self-Defense in Art JoeUser Forums

Ted, This, perhaps not surprisingly, is my new favorite of your poems. The only thing I would suggest is that you make the dividing line clearer between the two narrators...it took a double take to see that it was two different people. Punctuation might even do the trick... This poem has a very clear, well thought out vision. I, for one, understand and accept it. There. I'm done being a stuffy critic. I kinda sound like an asshol

Reply to I won a million dollars! in Misc JoeUser Forums

Oh! Good. I wonder, Ted, did we all get the same amount or was it based on how many cd's you bought? I can't remember.

Reply to Hefty Hefty Hefty! in Misc JoeUser Forums

Y'know, Ted, that's EXACTLY what I did (skipping the days workout, that is). We can accept tips, which is nice. I actually got a fiver yesterday! I was impressed. If a guy tries hard enough, he can usually make two, even three dollars in tips in an eight hour shift. Twice that in the summer, with all the tourists. Most aren't used to a "full service food market" like the one we run.

Reply to Dear Comedy Central in Entertainment JoeUser Forums

Good point, imajinit, but I'm not exactly mainstream or normal...not sure what that has to do with anything, but...umm...nevermind. Throwing up is still gross. Peace.

Reply to Dear Comedy Central in Entertainment JoeUser Forums

Thanks guys. I'm glad there's some other people out there who don't think throwing up is funny. I, personally, hate doing it. Chris

Dear Comedy Central in Entertainment JoeUser Forums

Here's what I hate: I was sitting down watching Comedy Central, trying to enjoy The Daily Show (this topic is not up for discussion, I do enjoy it) when I was completely grossed out during the commercial breaks. They showed numerous times ( I don't recall how many) people (or puppets) vomiting all over the place or sneezing huge gobs of snot across the room. I mean, seriously? Is this what passes for comedy these days? I don't watch either of

Different Town in Humor JoeUser Forums

Sorry folks, but I have to write the words to my new favorite song here. It's by Strong Bad. He writes about what he would do if he could make his town different. It comes straight from the heart, and that's what makes it special. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeelllll.... The Poopsmith he could talk *HEL-LO* And Marzipan would rock And The Stick would be this big old tree That would try to eat

Reply to Girls In Stocking Hats in Art JoeUser Forums

I gotta admit, Ted, I've always liked this poem. I think it would go over well with a Minnesota crowd, just make sure you mention that you wrote it when you were in Nawlins. Peace, Chris

Hefty Hefty Hefty! in Misc JoeUser Forums

Today at work we lifted and stacked 50 lbs bags of deer feed. Nothing to tough for a guy of my size and youth, well, it wouldn't have been if I'd had some decent help. The two guys I worked with, stacked, would have weighed maybe what I do. That may be an exaggeration, but one guy, Rex, is about 5'4" and can't weigh more than 120 lbs. Jesse on the other hand probably weighs in at a relatively beefy 140, but he's about 5'8", so the extra heft doesn't re

Reply to Open my mouth at open mic? in Life Journals JoeUser Forums

C'mon, Ted. We all know (or soon will know) about your drinking problem. I want to hear a poem about that. Chris

Play it by here in Misc JoeUser Forums

I have been coerced into taking a part in the local Community Education play. I like acting. I don't like acting like a moron. My aunt runs the Community Education program in our small town, and she NEEDED another male performer or the show would not go on. The play is called "Laffing Room Only", which is extremely stupid, but the play isn't as bad as the ones they've done in the past. Mostly they

Reply to I'm forming a pirate crew in Blogging JoeUser Forums

Yarrgh...Dubya.

Reply to I won a million dollars! in Misc JoeUser Forums

Oh, you're right russ! I remember that part, too. Maybe I should donate my $13.86 to charity. It would be minor act, no doubt, but the significance would minimal as well. Chris

I won a million dollars! in Misc JoeUser Forums

So I got a check in the mail today. For thirteen dollars and eighy-six cents. I can now half fill my gas tank. It's from the Compact Disc Minimum Advertised Price Anti-trust Litigation. Thinking back, VERY HARD, I remember signing up for this class action lawsuit probably back in High School...I graduated five years ago. This is our court system in action, folks. If I recall, it was something about music stores overcharging for CD's...they go

Reply to When Monday Can't Come Soon Enough in Life Journals JoeUser Forums

Sanity is totally overrated. But Chicago isn't. I think. Chris

Reply to Something foul in the state of Denmark... in Humor JoeUser Forums

Thanks Fawn, You seem to be somewhat of an experienced user...what's this whole point system thing? I couldn't find a FAQ or anything to explain it.

May in October in Misc JoeUser Forums

There she is again, sitting. Always sitting. I've seen her sitting in a thousand places; half real and half in my dreams. She sits in libraries, in meadows, in post-apocolyptic Russia under the unforgiving Asian sun. She sits in doorways, hallways, parkways and skyways. She sits in all kinds of weather in all kinds of seasons. She has sat forever, an

Reply to Where I Am Tonight in Blogging JoeUser Forums

Ah, yes, life as a radical. The problem with a lot of people is that they take themselves far too seriously. Judge not lest ye be judged. Gays are here to stay, people. Accept, move on. It's call adaptation, and it's how we survive. Chris