Xaltec

Xaltec

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Older Women ARE better because... An older woman will never wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you, "What are you thinking?" An older woman doesn't care what you think. An older woman always carries a condom in her purse. A younger woman is still hoping the guy might have one on him. An older woman is a cheaper date. A younger woman will cost you 12 beers, but an older woman will sleep with you after a cup of herbal tea. An older woman can

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

mr werewolf!! Uh...top 10 things not to say to a naked man: 10: Awww...that's cute 9. Well, at least you're good at other things 8. Do you think it'll fit my old Barbie® clothes? 7. My li'l brother has one like that. 6. Are you cold? 5. ::giggles:: 4. Maybe we should ju

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

And one more for you Kimbabe befor i go to bed! Men's Lifestyles Through the Ages DRINK at age... 17... Beer 25... Beer 35... Scotch 48... Double scotch 66... Maalox SEDUCTION LINE at age... 17... My parents are away for the weekend. 25... My girlfriend is away for the weekend. 35... My fiancee is away for the weekend. 48... My wi

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Women's Lifestyles Through the Ages AGE... DRINK 17... Winecoolers 25... White wine 35... Red wine 48... Dom Perignon 66... Shot of Jack with an Ensure chaser EXCUSES FOR REFUSING DATES 17... Need to wash my hair 25... Need to wash and condition my hair 35... Need to color my hair 48... Need to have Francois color my hair 66... Need to have Francois color my wig FAVORITE SPORT 17... shopping 25... shopping

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

How to spot if your woman has PMS (sorry for swearing! ) She stops reading Glamour and starts reading Guns and Ammo. She considers chocolate a major FDA food group. She puts on one of those pads with "wings," then flies off the roof laughing hysterically while riding a broom. She's developed a new talent for spinning her head around in 360 degree circles. S

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

TOP 10 REJECTION LINES GIVEN BY WOMEN (and what they actually mean) 10. I think of you as a brother.. (You remind me of that inbred banjo-playing geek in "Deliverance.") 9. There's a slight difference in our ages.. (I don't want to do my dad) 8. I'm not attracted to you in 'that' way.. (You are the ugliest dork I've ever laid eyes on.) 7. My life is too complicated right now.. I don't want you spending the whole night or else you may he

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Seminars For Males (Prepared and Presented by Females) 1. Combatting stupidity 2. You too can do housework 3. PMS: Learn when to keep your mouth shut 4. How to fill an ice tray 5. We do not want sleazy underthings for Christmas: give us money 6. Understanding the female response to your coming in drunk at 4am 7. Wonderful laundry techniques (formerly titled, "Don't wash my silks") 8. Parenting: It doesn't end with conception 9. Get a life; learn

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Seminars for Females (Prepared and presented by Males) 1. Elementary map reading 2. Crying and law enforcement 3. Advanced math seminar: Programming your VCR 4. You can go shopping for less than 4 hours 5. Gaining five pounds vs. the end of the world: A study in contrast. 6. PMS: It's your problem, not mine ("It's happened monthly since puberty-deal with it.") 7. Driving I. Getting past automatic transmissions 8. Driving II. The meaning of blinking or

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Kimbabe... Was that a good night out then?? THE MAN'S POINTS SYSTEM For all you guys out there who just can't figure it out, here it is: In the world of romance, one single rule applies: Make the woman happy. Do something she likes & you get points. Do something she dislikes & points are subtracted. You don't get any points for doing something she expects...Sorry, that's

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

One more, then time for bed! If She'll let me in the room!! Element: Woman Symbol: Wo Atomic Weight: Accepted as 118, but known to vary 105-175. Discoverer: Adam Occurrence: Copious quantities in all Urban areas, with slightly lower concentrations in Suburban and Rural areas. Subject to seasonal fluctuations. Physical Properties

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

One more for you then Weaksid! Why Dogs are Better than Women: Dogs don't cry. Dogs love it when your friends come over. Dogs don't care if you use their shampoo. Dogs think you sing great. A dog's time in the bathroom is confined to a quick drink. Dogs don't expect you to call when you are running late, and the later you are, the more excited dogs

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Just to show i can joke about guys aswell Kimbabe! HOW TO IMPRESS A WOMAN Compliment her, respect her, honor her, cuddle her, kiss her, caress her, love her, stroke her, tease her, comfort her, protect her, hug her, hold her, spend money on her, wine and dine her, buy things for her, listen to her, c

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

And another! Why Coffee Is Better Than Women: ~ Coffee doesn't mind if you wake up at 3 AM and decide to have some. ~ You won't get arrested for trying to buy coffee at 3 AM. ~ Coffee never runs out. ~ No matter how ugly you are, you can always get a cup of coffee. ~ You can always ditch a bad cup of coffee. ~ When coffee gets old, you can throw it away. ~ Co

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

1. Bicycles don't pregnant. 2. You can ride your bicycle any time of the month. 3. Bicycles don't have parents. 4. Bicycles don't whine unless something is really wrong. 5. You can share your bicycles with your friends. 6. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you've ridden. 7. When riding, you and your bicycle can arrive at the same time. 8. Bicycles don't care how many other bicycles you have now. 9. Bicycles don't care if you look at other bicycle

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Reply to Messageboard Joke Marathon in WinCustomize Talk WinCustomize Forums

Ok guys, own up...which one are you? Excitable Type Pants are twisted, cannot find hole, rips pants in anger. Sociable Type Joins pals for a pee whether he wants one or not. Timid Type Cannot pee if anyone is watching, pretends he has been and sneaks back later. Nosy Type Peeps over partition to have a look at the other fellow's thingy. Indifferent Type All urinals being occupied, uses sink. Clever Type Pee

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