April Bowlby

That was the best Hugh Hefner impersonation
I have ever seen, sheer genius.

Hi Tim,
You are about as funny as a train wreck.
You have a friend that drank some cola
but you never had any.
After you get your divorce and move in
with a room mate,
I wonder what station you will be broadcasting from?

I found that the vibration level
that works great and will make me smile
is 14,500 RPM.

A company generates advertising revenue from
the sale of the goods they make.
If the cost of advertising went down
company's could lower the price of the goods
they sell. People buying the goods would
have more money to buy more products
and this would stimulate the economy.
Advertising rates have risen to an unsustainable level.

Birds plus hot coco = ?

Dumb Water

No matter how hard I try to plan my life,
life always throws a wrench in it.
I'm hoping for as few wrenches as possible.

Is this your problem? http://stephanpastis.wordpress.com/

The problem is that it is very tiring,
trying to talk to monkeys.
The only way they like you is if you have the right smell.

Just remember what ever you load on that hard drive
will have to be reloaded when that hard drive fails.
It's all in the delay.

You have freedom of speech.
If you say the wrong thing you
will be fired from your job.
Do you really have freedom of speech?
If you decide you don't have freedom of speech,
then it would appear that you were lied to when you were young.

For deminstration only.
I spelled that wrong on purpose.

"Chief Inspector Dreyfus: When I first heard the name Clouseau, he was a little nothing.

I don't want to know where and when the shoe will hit the floor,
although that is useful information.
I want to know why the shoe hits the floor.

What gives matter mass?

Here is my explanation.

Weight is an illusion created by our mind.
Things don't really have any weight.
With out our senses the universe doesn't exist.
Everything is a wave.
Our mind is a receiver that interprets the waves
and drawls a picture that is our reality.
Everything is the interaction of waves.

Now we just have to figure out what these
waves are and what they exist in.

Question:
Lets say you have a nuclear reactor that is melting down.
If you set off a nuke at ground level at the reactor,
would the fuel dissipate and stop reacting?
If so would this be worse than a melt down?

I would like to compare owning a business to
being President of the U.S.
If you own the business
people who work for you have to do what you tell them to do.
If you are the President of the U.S. it isn't
quite that cut and dry.
This makes being President a greater challenge.

My best porno star story:
One night at a night club I found my self dancing
with 2 girls.
I asked them if they wanted to go back to my place and party.
They said yes, so they followed me to my place.
When we got there we cracked some beers and talked a little while.
Then they asked me if I had any coke or meth?
I said no and they left.
This has been the violent atomic bomb of reality.

"Just another police officer in a small village far from Paris. He was the village idiot."

Just change your name to Van Halen.

High Plains Drifter

"It is better to love than to be right"  (she means than to get the last word in) -- Mother Teresa of Calcutta

Where does the "second thought" that saves us from making a self-destructive mistake originate?  Is it from our better angels that we are saved from a destructive course of action  or merely the instinct for self preservation and not really worthy of being called "thought" at all?  Does it matter? 

That "second thought" comes from when your temper cools down
and you can think clearly again.