Here's one for Po.

I think it was him going on about goats.

or this one

you know how much I like to rant.

Oops ... the one for Po didn't work.

There ya go Po.

I hit the wrong button.

I don't like goats. Never had. Hated them since I was a kid. Ewe might think that is odd, especially since I sport a goatee, but refrain from butting in as I explain.

When I was about 10 years old, I was walking through the woods with some friends. We came across a big, black, deep hole. One of my friends, Spoony, picked up a rock and tossed it into the hole. We stood listening for the rock to hit bottom. Nothing.

So, Spoony turns to me and said "that must be a deep hole...lets throw something bigger in there and listen for it to hit bottom." So we found a bigger rock. It took me, Spoony, and Mike to pick it up. We lugged it over to the hole and dropped it in. We listened. For a long time. Nothing.

Mike looked at me and said we needed to throw something even bigger into it. Spoony saw this big old log a ways off. It took all three of us to pick it up, grunting, groaning, swearing as best we could at that age. We got it to the hole and tossed it in. We waited. And waited. Nothing.

Then...all of a sudden...out of nowhere...this goat comes flying out of the woods, running like the freakin wind, flew past us, and jumped straight into the damn hole! We were freaking out. We decided to get the hell out of there.

On the way out of the woods, we ran across this old farmer. He stopped us and asked if we had seen a goat. Spoony lost it and started to tell the old guy that we had...that we had just seen a goat fly out of the woods like a bat out out of hell (Spoony was colorful that way) , run and jump into this big, black, bottomless hole. Mike said "Was that your goat , Mister?"

The old farmer said 'Naw, that can't be my goat. Mine was chained to a big ol' log"

That's why I hate goats. One traumatized me.

Then I guess you won't be taking that shepherd job after all.

Uvah, that'd be goatherd, actually.

However, Po` still wouldn't be taking such a job.

Apart from the goat jumping into the seemingly bottomless big black hole, Julie Andrews probably traumatised him considerably more....

>

Details ... details.

Ten seconds was all it took to traumatize me! She was good back in the day but not now. Oh no no no ..............

Well you lasted 7 seconds longer that the two old geezers up on the balcony... and 8 seconds longer than me.

Following that 2 seconds I tied to get an appointment with my therapist, but apparently he's fully booked until 2022 because of the Sound of Music reunion.  It seems the hotel hosting it had Ms Andrews' live performance of 'The Hills are Alive' piped throughout all 46 floors, and my shrink was assigned the task of trauma management for all staff and guests.

Your shrink got rich on that one. If I had his money I'd burn yours.

Yup, and he increased his fee because of his brush with fame.  Apparently, Julie Andrews was traumatised after hearing her own voice over the loudspeaker system and was the first patient in attendance suffering with nausea, headaches and involuntary spasms.

Involuntary spasms?!?!?! Wow...that must have been shaky. I wonder what she'll do now that she can't stand to hear herself. I think maybe she'll go see another shrink for a second opinion, maybe even lie down on his couch. Never know or...she can re-visit the scene of her last diddly on The Sound of Music and listen for where it started or...go home, chill out and have a few brewskies to calm her spasmodic self.

Yeah, when ever The Sound of Music gets replayed on TV, I have a voluntary spasm in my remote thumb and suddenly something else is on.  This one time, though, I had just turned on the TV and went to make a cuppa before I settled in to watch Friday Night Footy.  I'm just about to put a spoonful of sugar into my cup and what d'yer think I hear?  Julie Andrews belting out "A Spoonful of Sugar."

Yup, you guessed it, I was traumatised and needed a sedative to calm me down, meaning I missed the majority of the game while I was snoring on the couch.  I couldn't figure out who to sue at the time, Julie Andrews for the original offence, ot the TV station for repeating it.  Anyhow, by the time I had figured that out, the judge said that the statute of limitations had expired and that the bag of upchuck I provided as evidence of severe trauma was inadmissible due to a Barry Manilow concert being televised on another channel.  He said that either could have produced the upchuck and that I could not prove that I had not inadvertently tuned into the Manilow concert while trying to find the footy.

That Marry Banilow will do it every time. Just when you thought it was safe to chill out in front of the boob tube along comes this ne'er do well to spoil it all. And if that ain't enough you got to deal with all those commercials tryin' to sell you stuff you don't need or can ill afford or just plain don't want. They should gear those things towards people who are interested and leave us jolly good guys to our jollies whether it be 'footy', don't know what that is or watching a bunch of overpowered cars running around an oval track at three hundred miles an hour. Maybe not three hundred but close enough. I prefer Nascar races to football or baseball or any other sport.

All jokes aside, I hate advertising with a passion because the contriving bastards who think of it all try to force it down your throat at every opportunity they have.  Seriously, if I saw an advertiser drowning in the river and there was a lifebelt or a concrete block, I'd throw him the concrete block... same with bankers. Both are lowlife scum to me.... after your money at any cost, and if you die of starvation in the precess, it's just a "So what!" to them.

Sadly, there were nowhere enough swan dives out of Wall St high rises during the GFC... cos the same bastards who caused it are still running things.

In some countries they'd have been executed without trial for that... but sadly Wall St got away with it because the US hasn't become quite that civilised as yet.

I could not agree more. If this had happened in an Islamic country like Iran they would have been executed. It all comes down to the same thing again and again. Money talks and bullshit walks. What will these guys do when the very thing that keeps them in all their wealth comes crashing down around them. Eventually its going to happen. There is no way this country or any other with a capitalist attitude can long survive in a world where poverty reigns and nobody gives a damn!