banned for not having a connection to someone who makes cheap trinkets

Banned for rocking the Casbah while I was trinket hunting and why are there large stones all over the place?

Banned 'cause them be cockle stones. Do your homework.

Banned for stone the flamin' crows and why are the buzzards hovering over a thatched roof?

banned for flying off the moon and into the gases of uranus 

Banned for Venus in blue jeans and why is a Mars bar so darned tasty?

Banned for lack of M&M's in your dissertation.

banned for using abbreviations for names 

Banned for you're lucky he didn't go with PPs and is that a flood heading your way?

banned for trying to flood the desert

Banned for abandoning desserts in the desert.

banned for letting in the ice cream

Banned for is that ice cream I see before me and where's the ten gallon hat it came in?

banned for wanting only a 10 gallon hat

Banned for implying Hoss wears a bigger one and how high is the tallest prairie grass on the Ponderosa?

Banned for grassy knolls.

banned for not going up and to the left

Banned for making hay while the keepers of the knoll watch for errant individuals with mowers - and why are there nut jobs on their knees, with scissors in hand,  trying to cut down the cherry tree?

banned for cherry picking everything

Banned for I only ever picked a cherry that was ripe for the pluckin' - and why does the peach come beggin' to be tasted before the lemon gets out?

Banned for fruity analogies. 

banned for going analog

Banned for analogging in the state forest and why do you sound like a chainsaw when you're snoring your head off?

banned for listening to the lies told about me

Banned for going where the bulrushes and did you hear the one about the dwarf liar who said he was once 7 foot 6?