My Alternative cuss words

from JoeUser Forums
It’s strange how I grew up around people that cuss, yet I am not one to cuss much. Sure, I say the basic sh**t or a**hole when I am angry or something has upset me, but for the most part, I tend to stay away from the big words...even the ones I know in Spanish (what a geek, I know). Because of this, I find myself spewing out the dumbest things.... This is usual inbloom talk : “freaking” this or “freaking” that, “that sucks”, “that’s pissing me off”, “son of a crap!”, “crapperoni”, “cripies!”, just plain old “crap”, “moron”, among others ...other suggested words are welcome...my cursing vocabulary needs to be expanded. =)
misc
18,791 views 31 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
nope not gonna contribute to your usage of bad words. heh heh
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
You're a saint in bloom! I cannot help myself and let the big nasty words come out b4 i know it.
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Well, like George Carlin said, ya ain't foolin' anybody! Shoot is shit with two Os...
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
Haha...I think it's teacheritis...I find myself fabricating my own cuss words as well. My favorite for "f#cking" is "Faaching" or f'ing...it's really a toss up. We should publish a lexacon of"dainty cuss words."
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Flippin Crackerheads!
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
I use phrases like

"oh my" and "That's rough" to replace certain cuss words. I also use sucks, stinks, frick, and the rest.
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
I, too, grew up around potty mouths, but never felt the need to become one myself. Until recently. I married a potty mouth. Now he's cleaned up his act, but I adopted his old habits. Sometimes a good profane word just says it all. For the first time in my life I don't even feel naughty. I just feel expressive.

I agree with Shovelheat:
Well, like George Carlin said, ya ain't foolin' anybody!


In my purist days I eliminated all expletives from my vocabulary: I didn't even say darn or heck. Nope. I tried hard to find a well-worded, effective way to describe my feelings instead of resorting to cavetalk. That didn't last long, but I think it's a neat idea...
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
Sometimes a good profane word just says it all.


I had a friend in high school whose mother let loos with a string of explitives on day that sounded possitively shocking.....But I found out later that it was just "dainty words" posing as swearing. I don't remember all of it but it finished with &#$%)*#&...two-headed son of a camel jockey"

As mentioned above, sometimes you need a goo profane word!
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
I use the word screwed a lot.

I don't like to swear much myself. I use jerk, crap, and suck a lot.

I see it as just words, though. If they are used too much, they lose their power. If they are used sparingly (like in literature or some movies), the point gets across.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
my favorite alternate swear is to say MONKEY! very intensely. It's great for when you bacg your shin on a desk or slam your hand in a drawer. I still use the real ones occasionally, but I'm trying to clean it up so my 3 year old won't copy me.
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
~Well, like George Carlin said, ya ain't foolin' anybody!~

lol....well, since my fave alt cuss word is "freak, you know what word I'd be saying all the time if I had the nerve.

~As mentioned above, sometimes you need a good profane word!~
true...sh**t is the one I use the most.

~Haha...I think it's teacheritis...I find myself fabricating my own cuss words as well. My favorite for "f#cking" is "Faaching" or f'ing...it's really a toss up.
We should publish a lexacon of"dainty cuss words."~

lol alison... you know, I work with a teacher who swears like a sailor (of course she makes sure kids aren't within earshot)...but she is isn't the norm lol.

~I use jerk, crap, and suck a lot.~

I use those ALOT, too

~ my favorite alternate swear is to say MONKEY! very intensely. It's great for when you bacg your shin on a desk or slam your hand in a drawer.
I still use the real ones occasionally, but I'm trying to clean it up so my 3 year old won't copy me.~

Hey, maybe I'll try that one sometime!

~I also use sucks, stinks, frick, and the rest.~

frick might be a nice one to use.

~You're a saint in bloom! I cannot help myself and let the big nasty words come out b4 i know it.~

oh, i'm no saint at all, but yeah, compared to others, my language isn't very colorful. lol

~nope not gonna contribute to your usage of bad words. heh heh~

awww, well, if you change your mind, give me a holler.

~I, too, grew up around potty mouths, but never felt the need to become one myself.~

People in my family find it funny that I don't cuss...they make fun of my alternative words. lol

~Flippin Crackerheads!~

lol, nice one!
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
my cursing vocabulary needs to be expanded.



Why?
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
~"Stupid illegitimate son of a sand lizard!"~

wow..nice one. lol

~Why?~

well....I can only use crap and sucks and freaking so much....so I thought I'd look for others alt words....besides, in my odd little way of thinking, I feel it might prevent me from moving on to the big words.
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
If said right anything can be a cuss... watch and say out loud.


Why don't you go GOLF YOURSELF!!! see?
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
well....I can only use crap and sucks and freaking so much....so I thought I'd look for others alt words....besides, in my odd little way of thinking, I feel it might prevent me from moving on to the big words.


Why not just expand your already existing vocabulary and insult or express emotion using big words without cussing?
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." -Mark Twain

Shakespeare had some excellent insults as well, if you are in the market for insults. They can take a moment to unravel, giving you time to run away.

"Were I like thee I'd throw myself away." Taken from: Timon of Athens
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
"Under certain circumstances, profanity provides a relief denied even to prayer." -Mark Twain

Shakespeare had some excellent insults as well, if you are in the market for insults. They can take a moment to unravel, giving you time to run away.

"Were I like thee I'd throw myself away." Taken from: Timon of Athens


I guess it's not for me.
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
Some favorites from my house:

What the erf?

What the frick?

Freakin'

Effin'

Son of a Mother

Craptastic

Suckiest Sucker that ever Sucked

Jerkface

Jesus Christ!...is a great savior

God in Heaven

Beotch

Mother Father

That's just a short list. I have many, many more, hehe.

My personal favorite, which is cursing lite, is "Dammit to freakin' Hell!"
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
InBloom: One evening while working the 3-11 shift in a nursing home, I dropped a tray of food and I squatted down
to pick up the mess, knowing I'd have to run to the kitchen for another tray and I was gonna say oh f--- and when I saw the
black shoes of what I thought belonged to the owner of the home, I uttered "oh fudgesickles!" it turns out it was the shoes
of the janitor.
Now I like to say "oh crapola" and "oh fiddlesticks", at the bus company I worked for I would say "oh dear" giving
the impression I was worried when in truth I was angry.
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
We say:


Frickin' (as in 'what the frick?' or 'frickin' heck!')

Christ on a cracker

Dagnammit

Crapola

Shite

Mofo

Eejit

Maroon

Garshdangit.

Then, when the kids aren't around, I cuss like a sailor. Even D mentions my cussing sometimes.
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
Mofo


Forgot about that one. Excellent.
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ours was "Christ on a crutch!"
Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top
~Why don't you go GOLF YOURSELF!!! see?~

Yep, it sure does sound bad when you say it in a certain tone. lol

~Why not just expand your already existing vocabulary and insult or express emotion using big words without cussing?~

Thought it be interesting to try some new stuff.

~"Were I like thee I'd throw myself away." ~

Classy , yet says it all...

~Suckiest Sucker that ever Sucked~

I think I might use this one! I liked it.

~I uttered "oh fudgesickles!"~

Trudy, reminds me of the movie, "A Christmas Story" when they show the boy say "oh fudge" then the narrator of the movie says, "except I didn't say fudge...I said the mother of all words..." I think we all know what that was lol...love that movie.

~Then, when the kids aren't around, I cuss like a sailor. Even D mentions my cussing sometimes.~

I know some people who ave cuss words in every single sentence they utter...but they don't even notice they do it until someone points it out. lol

~"Christ on a crutch!"~

I say God bless it a lot....I'm sure some people will accuse me of using the lords name in vain . lol
I also use holy crap, which my sister hates because she thinks it's disrespectful (which I find funny, because she's quite a cusser herself lol)
Reply #25 from JoeUser Forums Top
~Suckiest Sucker that ever Sucked~

I think I might use this one! I liked it.

Yeah me too! What do you think the suckiest sucker that ever sucked actually sucked though? Heh, probably a frikin mofo...