dharmagrl dharmagrl

Pieces of me

Pieces of me

What I am:

... emotionally bruised.  Damaged goods, I suppose.

... trying to be less angry and vengeful.

.... trying not to give in to temptation.

... a worthless friend sometimes.

... a not-so-good mom some days.

... a lazy housekeeper.  I'll do it when it needs doing, but hardly ever before.

... "flighty" (my dad's words)

... selfish.

... a wanna be, trying-to-be Zen warrior.

...sensitive to other people's perceptions of me.

... afraid of confrontation for confrontation's sake.  I'll do it when I have to, but I don't like it.

... acutely aware of my failings and flaws.  I don't need your mirror to show me what's wrong with my personality, I can see well enough on my own, thanks.

 

What I am not:

... dishonest.

... egotistical. (although part of me thinks that writing an article such as this is more than a little egotistical and wonders why I'm doing it)

... materialistic.

...  a doormat.  Don't walk on me.

... devoid of feelings.  I hurt the same as everyone else does.

 

 

 

11,366 views 28 replies
Reply #26 Top

Dharma, I totally understand the sentiments behind this blog. I told Zombie before he married me that I was "damaged goods" and came "as is". I still feel like that from time to time, but usually it is temporary.


I hope you learn to realize that you are so much more than the things you have written here. You are a caring, loving, interesting and fascinating (my definition of "flighty") woman.

Reply #27 Top

I can feel most of what you wrote, and trust me I can undertand your situation..

I thought you might be able to...

I think most of us could find ourselves in that description, or most of it.

It seems to be a universal feeling...

 

Hugs to ya

Right back at ya!

I think you're one helluva woman and that you're real, so dont change

Wow...thank you!  That's one of the nicest things anyone's said to me...!  I'm not going to change...not drastically, anyway.

I still feel like that from time to time, but usually it is temporary.

It is for me too.  

 

I hope you learn to realize that you are so much more than the things you have written here.

I do.  I know that I am more than the sum of my parts.  I know that I'm more things than i wrote here...I just find it difficult to write self-praising articles. I'm just not like that, dig?  I can run myself down until the cows come home...but ask me to tell you something positive about me and I'll have to sit and think about it.  I think that you're a lot like that too, Heather.  Dunno why, there's nothing that you've said (or haven't said)...I just get that impression.

Reply #28 Top

I'm just not like that, dig? I can run myself down until the cows come home...but ask me to tell you something positive about me and I'll have to sit and think about it. I think that you're a lot like that too, Heather. Dunno why, there's nothing that you've said (or haven't said)...I just get that impression.

Oh boy are you right. My husband's goal for the last eight years is teaching me just to say "Thank you" and nothing else to a compliment. If some one says I am pretty, I always laugh it off and say something sarcastic like "Thanks but you obviously don't get out much if you think so." Now I can at least say, "Thank you, I am glad you think so." Better than before, but it is such a struggle. Dharma we are so much alike it is scary.

Hang in there. This feeling will pass as we both know. It is a temporary thing.

*hugs*