Pieces of me

What I am:

... emotionally bruised.  Damaged goods, I suppose.

... trying to be less angry and vengeful.

.... trying not to give in to temptation.

... a worthless friend sometimes.

... a not-so-good mom some days.

... a lazy housekeeper.  I'll do it when it needs doing, but hardly ever before.

... "flighty" (my dad's words)

... selfish.

... a wanna be, trying-to-be Zen warrior.

...sensitive to other people's perceptions of me.

... afraid of confrontation for confrontation's sake.  I'll do it when I have to, but I don't like it.

... acutely aware of my failings and flaws.  I don't need your mirror to show me what's wrong with my personality, I can see well enough on my own, thanks.

 

What I am not:

... dishonest.

... egotistical. (although part of me thinks that writing an article such as this is more than a little egotistical and wonders why I'm doing it)

... materialistic.

...  a doormat.  Don't walk on me.

... devoid of feelings.  I hurt the same as everyone else does.

 

 

 

11,365 views 28 replies
Reply #1 Top
Sounds like a lot of folks I know (including me:) )
Reply #2 Top

(including me:) )

Wow....so I'm not the only one who feels like this?  I'm honestly a little awed.  I thought I was the only one...or one of very, very few.

Thanks, Greywar!

Reply #3 Top

....so I'm not the only one who feels like this?


Well pop never referred to me as "flighty" but he did toss around "rookie" and "recruit" pretty often

Reply #4 Top
hey, unhappy warrior, sounds like you're talking about most of us (xcept the mom part) here. Just like you, we're real people. We just have varying degrees of hiding it.
Reply #5 Top
As one imperfect person to another, we all have our problems, and I know I share a number of these with you. But your list isn't long enough, you left out what a kind and caring person you are
Reply #6 Top

you left out what a kind and caring person you are


indeed you did... Danny scores as more perceptive than I as usual:)

Reply #7 Top

Well pop never referred to me as "flighty" but he did toss around "rookie" and "recruit" pretty often

I never got called those....he did toss in 'social butterfly' once, but mostly it was 'flighty'.

Just like you, we're real people. We just have varying degrees of hiding it.

Some of us do an incredibly good job at hiding it.  If I didn't know better I'd have difficulty believing that some people around here are human in any shape or form (not you, Scatter.  I can tell you're a person )

your list isn't long enough, you left out what a kind and caring person you are

Thanks, Danny....but I don't think that I'm that kind or that caring...and apparently some other people don't think I am either. :/

Reply #8 Top

and apparently some other people don't think I am either. :/


it pays to remember how body language and inflection are lost over the net. I don't think the person in question had any malice in her heart.

Reply #9 Top
Seems your journey is paying off!  I hope I can make one as well.  You are a stong individual!  Dont ever lose that!
Reply #10 Top

it pays to remember how body language and inflection are lost over the net. I don't think the person in question had any malice in her heart.

Yeah, I know....but I wasn't talking about her.  The person I'm talking about shows me their body language up close and personal like on a daily basis.

Reply #11 Top

The person I'm talking about shows me their body language up close and personal like on a daily basis.


Oh. I am sorry, sort of thought that was resolved

Reply #12 Top

Seems your journey is paying off! I hope I can make one as well.


I think that you've already started...and it will pay off, trust me. 

Reply #13 Top

Oh. I am sorry, sort of thought that was resolved


It's okay, and I thought it was too.  I dunno what the problem is now, but I do know that I'm tired of it....

Reply #14 Top

I dunno what the problem is now, but I do know that I'm tired of it....


It takes time I suppose.. after a long separation me and mine have been working through similar problems...

Reply #15 Top

after a long separation me and mine have been working through similar problems...


..and again, I'm glad it's not just me (us)!


Everything I do irritates him.  Nothing I do is right or good enough...so I'm staying out of his way.  Seemes like the best plan....


 

Reply #16 Top

Nothing I do is right or good enough...so I'm staying out of his way.


It is a bit like starting the dating process over but without the rampaging hormones to help you along...

Reply #18 Top

good luck, love, hope it works out better

Thanks, Mikey.  It will, I'm sure.

 

Reply #19 Top
While I cannot pretend to understand all you have gone through, I can sympathize with feeling a little "bruised".

Take care of yourself and yours. I wish you the very best Dharma.
Reply #21 Top

I wish you the very best Dharma.

Thank you.  You too!

I can sympathize with feeling a little "bruised".

I think that anyone who's over the age of 25 or so can relate to that.  Especially this time of year...

 

PS -- that response to you was my 20,000th point

glad it came on your blog

Yay!  Me too!!

Reply #22 Top
I can feel most of what you wrote, and trust me I can undertand your situation.. You konw mine......

I'm off to the club to try to forget for a little while. I'll try to mail you tommorrow.....
Reply #23 Top
Very well said...I think most of us could find ourselves in that description, or most of it. 
Reply #24 Top
Hey Dharma...

Hugs to ya. xo
Reply #25 Top
Hope u feelin better dharma. I think you're one helluva woman and that you're real, so dont change

Merry Xmas to you and your family.