I just dont like games were i have to rush.
I dont either. And the AI is fairly stupid but they are more efficient at multitasking( such as exploring, colonizing,upgrading, researching, fighting you... all at the same time) and they get bonuses that give them a edge early on. So if they are to close they are just going to overrun you early and take all the fun out of it for you.
You want a multistar map as player that doesnt like to rush. Use the map designer to make one. I believe the game manual( in your sins folder) will tell you what all the sliders are for. This will allow you to create maps that are more suited for your playstyle. Later on when you want to add some variety and do some new things you can download galaxy forge and really customize your maps( its pretty easy to use) and even add mods to enhance the game( i use Maelstrom Mod myself because it gives a ton of extra planet types, new ship class, and 3 new races and its pretty balanced).
But if you are more into the building an empire and then fighting an enemy taking and defending planets, etc then you want to start with a multi star map. I usually add a couple of stars and about dozen or so planets around them that have no playable NPC enemies and then put 1 playable NPC enemy per star so they have room to build an empire.
Starting out build a colony cap and some light frigates. I go for the long range frigate ASAP.Especially if you play Tec because the range is longer than defense guns so they can safely hit defense guns.Research wise you want the first research to go towards colonize Ice and Volcanic( you always get an asteroid and either an Ice or Volcanic on either side of you so i wait to see which one that planet is). Colonize these 3 planets. Dont worry about upgrading your home planet at all.
Always build mines right away and upgrade the planet pop fully so you get no tax penalty and you get the income from pop. If you need to upgrade for a research structure go ahead and do that but keep the upgrades to a min for now.Focus research on things that increase your economy specifically such as mining bonuses and population bonuses.
Go hit your next planet( this would be the 3rd you colonized yourself) and repeat. Try to upgrade weapons, armor, and shields a little bit a long the way.
Train for another capital ship and build either a battleship or the siege cap add this to your fleet. I run a group of 5 caps and about 10 LR frigs and i can pretty much take out any colony easily even pirate bases. So this is your goal. Dont worry about the fleet supply penalty to much just make enough supply to get all your caps and your 10 frigs.
Keep going around taking planets, upgrading pop to full and building mines. Leave the planets sit after that. Your wanting to build an economy up. Keep your research focused on actual economic techs and on weapons/armor, shields, and HP and skip the rest for now. Build 1 Research structure per ice, volcanic,asteroid, and 2 for terran or desert until you have 8 of each.
Keep going and exploring your system. Within an hour you should have 5-10 planets.If you made it to planet that is linked to the star good. If not make your way that way. I leave a scout parked at the star( the race i typically play does not get the advance warning like TEC does). Try to explore the system as fast as possible( even if you use scouts just to see what it has in it).
You want to find you a choke point preferrably coming off the star with no other access points to the systems you own. This really depends on the phase lane chance set on the map. But you want a system that the enemy has to come through to get to your other systems. This is going to be your front line of defense for now.
This system fully upgrade the planet, its better if its a desert but a terran is the second best here. Build 1 cap factory and 2 frig factories( at least) hugging your planet on the side you expect the enemy to come from. Build 2 hangers apart from each other( one on each side but close to "front"). If you can build a starbase( i think that is a diplomacy thing) build one out front that covers your ship factories with weapon range. Upgrade fully. Place weapon turrets mainly in front between the direction you expect the enemy to come and your planet. Make sure the turrets can cover each other in range. I lay them on pretty thick up front and put just enough around the planet that they can cover the planet for any siege frigs that decide to bomb it while im busy fighting.
Once you set this system up.Build 4 more starbase constructors and send them to the sun. Build 4 starbase at the sun. I build by the phase lane in a square formation so they concentrate firepower. Also if you havent starbase tech should be fully upgraded by now. Upgrade the bases. and build an equal amount of fighters and bombers per base( on the planets my planet hangers build all fighters and my starbase does a 50/50 split).
Now you have two lines of defense setup. The star should always be a priority for starbases. Any planets that would lead in to your empire ( i typically do one for each phase lane from the star) needs to be set up this way. So you want to do this first and secure your empire/system.
You will also want to move your home planet closer to the sun so you get better alligence and thus better economic returns. I usually make my defensive planet home and if it is threatened and i question if i can win i move it
Once your secure NOW you want to build up your empire. Go around a build up the planets you conquered, conquer any left in the system. Build up logistics and defense. Always group you defenses together on the side the enemy is most likely to come from( the side that is more direct route from the star usually) build starbase at at every planet. I always set my systems up using the same defensive layout.
When you move to a new star and take new systems do the same thing but start with starbases. Send your fleet and constructors ( i keep a defense fleet handy too by this point usually a small group of caps that can either restore shield or hull). But now you set each system up completely as you take it over. Dont forget to add lots of culture structures throughout your empire.
You will find that this becomes really easy this way on easy. Soon you will be playing on vicious with multiple enemies tag teaming you and pirates, etc.