Banned for trolling for sharks.

Banned because I sent out an email proposing my title change to the 10 or so people I give advance copies, and it was universally panned.

Banned because it's past time to feed the cats.

Banned for it's time to feed the birds....

Banned for I've been floating downstream in the Tigris for days now.

edit: the titles were panned or the story?

Banned because there's no better river to float down than the Itchetucknee. Except maybe in the peak season when the rowdy tubers seem to come in one continuous flotilla.

banned for the same can be said of the Rocky River here in Texas.

Banned because I misspelled the Ichetucknee and as far as quick -.com web rooting goes, there don't appear to be no Rocky River in Texas. Is it anywhere near Austin? I've dunked in the cement pond at Barton Springs, and it was sweet for a municipal swimmin' hole.

Banned because I hate getting wet. Hate it hate it hate it....

Banned because I hope your family has sonic showers or a sweat tent. Agriculture might be the hallmark of humanity, but hygiene is the foundation of civilization.

Banned because I hate dirt even more than I hate getting wet.

banned for you're probably screwed.

Sorry, it's the Guadalupe River, but I'm use to the local slang for the best part for tubing. It cuts through New Braunfels and is a clear, rock bottom river for quite a stretch.

banned for slanging it

Banned for wetting it.

banned for not mentioning what was wet

Banned because water is wet.

Banned to extend this thread by one reply.

Banned for making other people's things extend.

banned for it would go further if they were wet.

Banned for I wouldn't touch that with a stick... 

banned for that

banned for touching two sticks together... well, we all know where the joke lies.

banned for stream jokes

banned for fresh water jokes.

banned for salty jokes