If I Were A Candidate For President, I'd...
Don't Wanna Get So Slick You Outslick Your Own Self
JoeUser Forums
on tonite's (oct 27, 2004) abc world news tonight pdt edition, peter jennings provided a list of states that have not been visited once by george bush nor john kerry. i believe the list consisted of 16 states although i can't confirm the number at the moment. three of those states were vermont, wyoming and hawaii.
perhaps it's residual jetlag. or my biological curmudgeon clock is kickin in again. whatever the reason, i can think of no appropriate excuse for a presidential candidate to ignore nearly 1/3 of these united states despite sparing them the dubious pleasure of having their major crop tasted, their regional eccentricities exploited and their babies kissed. i can only hope this doesnt mean those citizens arent also missing out on phonecalls from governor schwartzenegger urging them to vote for someone they're never gonna meet.
i realize it wouldnt be the smart thing to do (especially this weekend due to risk of inspiring the obvious halloween jokes), but if i were a candidate for the presidency, i'd spend two days between now and next tuesday inflicting myself on every one of the states the other guy's campaign directors presumes or has written off.
it might mean losing my election but thats what viagla's for. right?
