NEW ELEMENT IN PERIODIC TABLE......WOMAN

I dug up this one from my email archive after seeing Boxxi's post

Element : WOMAN

Symbol : WO+

Atomic mass : Accepted as 53.6 Kg; isotopes may vary from 40-200 kg.

Occurrence : Copious quantities in all urban areas.

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES

1. Boils at room temperature

2. Freezes without any known reason.

3. Melts if given special treatment.

4. Bitter, if incorrectly used.

5. Sweet as Honey if given a proper treatment.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES

1. Have great affinity for Gold, Silver and a range of precious stones and absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.

2. May explode spontaneously without prior warning and for no known reason.

3. Most powerful money reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES

1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.

2. Can be great aid to relaxation.

TESTS

1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when happy.

2. Turns green when placed behind a better specimen.

POTENTIAL HAZARD

Illegal to possess more than one, although several can be maintained at different locations as long as specimens do not come in direct contact with each other.

!! WARNING !!

PROLONGED EXPOSURE TO THIS ELEMENT CAN CAUSE SEVERE FINANCIAL HEMORRHAGING AND MENTAL DISTRESS.
3,477 views 7 replies
Reply #1 Top
Reply #2 Top
Penned by the pathologically/perennially single ....
Reply #3 Top
Penned by the pathologically/perennially single
End of quote


Could be thought to have taken his life in his own hands....at a womens lib conference, it might be considered to drastically shorten his life-span.

Shoot, I wouldn't be game to think such things, much less say 'em....and no, I didn't read any of 'em, either. Orright, then...just the first two, but once I discovered the line of thinking I stopped....honest I did.

Orright, it was more than a couple...but when I saw how sexist it all was, I stopped....

...tho I can't see why it'd need to be illegal to possess more than one. I mean, who in their right mind would want two mother-in-laws??
Reply #4 Top
HAHAHAHAHAHA!! Excellent!!
Reply #6 Top
apparently you know only a certain narrow range of women,, how sad for you
End of quote


I know only one type of woman, and it's not sad for me....she is beautiful and I meet her every day in many ways in all sorts of places/situations...for she is every woman.
Reply #7 Top
   Thanks I needed that.


Wait, I resemble that.