Extremely painful decision
but it has to be made.
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My wife and I have decided that we have been given little or no alternative by various authorities but to relinquish guardianship of our 15 yo runaway, Tanka, and make her a Ward of the State. It is the last resort, but the 'supposed' authorities have taken away all our parental abilities to protect, control, discipline her as necessary. In fact, we have been threatened with criminal charges should we try to intervene in her life/decisions against her will...and then they alternatively point blank refuse to act in her best interests.
Recently, her Family Services case worker told us the she had taken Tanka into care and was placing her in a supervised safe house....after which, they collected the remainder of Tanka's belongings...and promply dropped her off outside a store in a neighbouring suburb, from where Tanka made her way to an address where 3 men lived and inappropriate behaviour was commom practice.
Now how responsible is that...because Tanka elected to go elsewhere than the facility and was allowed to, without prior knowledge as to where or its appropriateness?
Two days later we get a call to come and collect her as she had been more trouble than 'even they' could handle, so we brought her home. We were given promises/assurances that she would behave now and toe the line....but as you guessed it, she took off again 2 days later. Apparently, she had finished with the 28 yo and has taken up with another man who is in his early 20's....and Family Services, came and collected her possessions yet again, and promptly assisted her to move in with this man, supposedly because his parents live there also and can supervise.
Still not a responsible action/decision by this waste of space department
This girl obviously has problems that need addressing urgently...but instead of taking her into care, a facility where that could commence, they're letting her decide when and where she will or won't go....apparently it's the law now, that children have the right to make life decisions....regardless of how irresponsible, foolish or downright stupid they are.
Anyhow, given government and departmental attitudes/inaction, the fact that this kid is playing the system for all its worth, and that we have been rendered totally powerless, causing stress related illness, we have decided to let go 100% and move on 100%
This sounds harsh, and believe me, it's the most painful, harrowing decision we've ever had to make....but it serves three purposes thay may just sway the balance of power...or at least give us some closure.
In the first instance, while we are still her legal guardians, the Dept of Families (State Govt) receives Federal Govt funding...and she is paid a fortnightly Homeless Allowance. Once we relinquish Guardianship to the State, that Federal funding stops and Tanka receives no allowance to spend as she pleases.
So in essence, it comes down to finances...who pays whom and for what. Stinks, don't it?
Secondly, whilst we are still her legal guardians, the State run Family Services Dept (supposedly in law) have no moral or legal obligation to intervene unless we have acted wrongly/inappropriately towards her (abuse) and as none of that has occurred, they see no reason to act and are quite happy to sit on their hands...whilst giving her enough rope to enable them to later place her in a child detention centre. So to counteract their policies, a lawyer has advised us to relinquish guardianship to the State, thus making it legal guardian and therefore responsible for her actions/behaviuour, etc.
The reasoning is that the Minister's Office cannot afford under those circumstances to allow her free reign to run amok as she is now....bad publicity, etc.
Once the process is complete Tanka will be a Ward of State until she turns 18, a fact she most certainly won't like, just as will she despise not having that fortnightly allowance to spend freely.
Strange, isn't it.. that under those circumstances, the Dept of Families has the power and authority to act, to place her in supervised facilities and impose curfews/restictions upon her, etc....yet not while we are her guardians. Bloody insane, isn't it? Therefore, if we cannot get the help and support to protect this child under the current arrangement, we will force the State Govt to act by making it her legal guardian, thus empowering/forcing them to act in her better interests...which is certainly not happening now. I/we are sure her view of the world will go through a dramatic change after all this...but she brought it upon herself and we are being cruel to be kind, if not to her, then at least to ourselves. I'm sure we've aged 10 years in the last 10 weeks or so!
Our third reason is for our own health, to be far removed from the stress and anxiety that has caused us so much pain and illness as a result....two minor stokes for me, severe depression, anxiety for us both As we cannot go out anywhere in town without being confronted by people with complaints about her behaviour (some becoming quite threatening towards Tanka and ourselves)....and even having complaints coming to our door, we are leaving town and moving to Hobart in the South, well away from it all where we can start with a clean slate.
Yeah, yeah.. but what if she pulls her horns in and decides to behave?? Well if and when she feels so inclined, we have made arrangements with a very astute aunt of hers who will determine her honesty, sincerity, etc, and if she is convinced Tanka is 100% genuine, she will pass on our phone number for a contact point from where we can ascertain if there's a possibility of a future family situation for the 3 of us again....although that's not likely until she turns 18 now, by which time she may have grown out of it.
I'm so sorry to have vented here yet again about this, but I'm so pissed at the lunacy/ineptitude/inefficiency of our electe officials and their bureaucrat lackies who collect salaries for doing sweet FA.
Recently, her Family Services case worker told us the she had taken Tanka into care and was placing her in a supervised safe house....after which, they collected the remainder of Tanka's belongings...and promply dropped her off outside a store in a neighbouring suburb, from where Tanka made her way to an address where 3 men lived and inappropriate behaviour was commom practice.
Now how responsible is that...because Tanka elected to go elsewhere than the facility and was allowed to, without prior knowledge as to where or its appropriateness?
Two days later we get a call to come and collect her as she had been more trouble than 'even they' could handle, so we brought her home. We were given promises/assurances that she would behave now and toe the line....but as you guessed it, she took off again 2 days later. Apparently, she had finished with the 28 yo and has taken up with another man who is in his early 20's....and Family Services, came and collected her possessions yet again, and promptly assisted her to move in with this man, supposedly because his parents live there also and can supervise.
Still not a responsible action/decision by this waste of space department
This girl obviously has problems that need addressing urgently...but instead of taking her into care, a facility where that could commence, they're letting her decide when and where she will or won't go....apparently it's the law now, that children have the right to make life decisions....regardless of how irresponsible, foolish or downright stupid they are.
Anyhow, given government and departmental attitudes/inaction, the fact that this kid is playing the system for all its worth, and that we have been rendered totally powerless, causing stress related illness, we have decided to let go 100% and move on 100%
This sounds harsh, and believe me, it's the most painful, harrowing decision we've ever had to make....but it serves three purposes thay may just sway the balance of power...or at least give us some closure.
In the first instance, while we are still her legal guardians, the Dept of Families (State Govt) receives Federal Govt funding...and she is paid a fortnightly Homeless Allowance. Once we relinquish Guardianship to the State, that Federal funding stops and Tanka receives no allowance to spend as she pleases.
So in essence, it comes down to finances...who pays whom and for what. Stinks, don't it?
Secondly, whilst we are still her legal guardians, the State run Family Services Dept (supposedly in law) have no moral or legal obligation to intervene unless we have acted wrongly/inappropriately towards her (abuse) and as none of that has occurred, they see no reason to act and are quite happy to sit on their hands...whilst giving her enough rope to enable them to later place her in a child detention centre. So to counteract their policies, a lawyer has advised us to relinquish guardianship to the State, thus making it legal guardian and therefore responsible for her actions/behaviuour, etc.
The reasoning is that the Minister's Office cannot afford under those circumstances to allow her free reign to run amok as she is now....bad publicity, etc.
Once the process is complete Tanka will be a Ward of State until she turns 18, a fact she most certainly won't like, just as will she despise not having that fortnightly allowance to spend freely.
Strange, isn't it.. that under those circumstances, the Dept of Families has the power and authority to act, to place her in supervised facilities and impose curfews/restictions upon her, etc....yet not while we are her guardians. Bloody insane, isn't it? Therefore, if we cannot get the help and support to protect this child under the current arrangement, we will force the State Govt to act by making it her legal guardian, thus empowering/forcing them to act in her better interests...which is certainly not happening now. I/we are sure her view of the world will go through a dramatic change after all this...but she brought it upon herself and we are being cruel to be kind, if not to her, then at least to ourselves. I'm sure we've aged 10 years in the last 10 weeks or so!
Our third reason is for our own health, to be far removed from the stress and anxiety that has caused us so much pain and illness as a result....two minor stokes for me, severe depression, anxiety for us both As we cannot go out anywhere in town without being confronted by people with complaints about her behaviour (some becoming quite threatening towards Tanka and ourselves)....and even having complaints coming to our door, we are leaving town and moving to Hobart in the South, well away from it all where we can start with a clean slate.
Yeah, yeah.. but what if she pulls her horns in and decides to behave?? Well if and when she feels so inclined, we have made arrangements with a very astute aunt of hers who will determine her honesty, sincerity, etc, and if she is convinced Tanka is 100% genuine, she will pass on our phone number for a contact point from where we can ascertain if there's a possibility of a future family situation for the 3 of us again....although that's not likely until she turns 18 now, by which time she may have grown out of it.
I'm so sorry to have vented here yet again about this, but I'm so pissed at the lunacy/ineptitude/inefficiency of our electe officials and their bureaucrat lackies who collect salaries for doing sweet FA.
and don't know how to change it...hope you can figure out where I recommenced afterwards. 
