I'm 21, for the 21st Time
Reflections on my birthday
from 
JoeUser Forums
JoeUser Forums
Today I turned 42 years old. The significance of this didn’t hit me until yesterday afternoon, when I was doing a little reflecting on the past twelve months. This is something I tend to do around this time of the year i.e. look back at my life since my last birthday and reflect on the things I’ve done. It is not an exercise in regrets but more like looking into a pool of time and reflecting on what I see.
Oops, I strayed a bit there, but I’m sure those reading will forgive me. Lets go back to the significance of turning 42, aside from the obvious jokes about being the answer to life, the universe and everything (none of which I have or know despite my constant searching). I realised yesterday 21 years have passed since I turned 21. I distinctly remember my 21st, which was celebrated with a large party of family and friends. For my immediate family, it was doubly significant as I was the eldest of my siblings.
As a 21 year old, I had the world at my feet. I was in the Royal Australian Air Force, I had just been posted back to the ACT where my family lived and I had just started playing in a band. While there is still a little of that young man left in me, I’m a different person from the young, emotionally immature, wide-eyed naïve man I was then. Some of the elements of this young man in me today are there because I have worked hard at maintaining them.
I believe I still have the same wide-eyed curiosity about the world. I also believe there is still some of the naïve boy in me. Sure, it means I ask questions that might be perceived as ‘obvious’ or even ‘dumb’, but obviousness is only apparent to those who know and I was told many years ago there is no such thing as a ‘dumb’ question and instead, it was ‘dumb’ not to ask questions if you had them.
I have better control over my emotions these days and can easily recognise when and why I become emotionally charged. Time has lent me a mindfulness and awareness I certainly didn’t have 21 years ago, although I know I have a long ways to go. I am still excited by music, particularly music I have helped create. The only thing that has changed here is my skills as a musician and producer.
All in all, I am very happy with the last 21 years. I’ve developed and grown, have loved and lost and loved again. I’ve been married, divorced and remarried. I’ve lost some hair and gained some wrinkles. I’ve said goodbye to some old friends and hello to lots more new ones. I’ve seen some beautiful places as well as some ugly ones. I’ve laughed, cried, worried and raged. I’ve been a bastard and a saint, I’ve been conceited and kind. I’ve had more ups than downs (thankfully) and hope to continue this pattern. So far, I’m very happy with the life I’ve made and am working hard to continue on this path. I have no complaints so far. Life is for living and this is exactly what I’m doing.
Oops, I strayed a bit there, but I’m sure those reading will forgive me. Lets go back to the significance of turning 42, aside from the obvious jokes about being the answer to life, the universe and everything (none of which I have or know despite my constant searching). I realised yesterday 21 years have passed since I turned 21. I distinctly remember my 21st, which was celebrated with a large party of family and friends. For my immediate family, it was doubly significant as I was the eldest of my siblings.
As a 21 year old, I had the world at my feet. I was in the Royal Australian Air Force, I had just been posted back to the ACT where my family lived and I had just started playing in a band. While there is still a little of that young man left in me, I’m a different person from the young, emotionally immature, wide-eyed naïve man I was then. Some of the elements of this young man in me today are there because I have worked hard at maintaining them.
I believe I still have the same wide-eyed curiosity about the world. I also believe there is still some of the naïve boy in me. Sure, it means I ask questions that might be perceived as ‘obvious’ or even ‘dumb’, but obviousness is only apparent to those who know and I was told many years ago there is no such thing as a ‘dumb’ question and instead, it was ‘dumb’ not to ask questions if you had them.
I have better control over my emotions these days and can easily recognise when and why I become emotionally charged. Time has lent me a mindfulness and awareness I certainly didn’t have 21 years ago, although I know I have a long ways to go. I am still excited by music, particularly music I have helped create. The only thing that has changed here is my skills as a musician and producer.
All in all, I am very happy with the last 21 years. I’ve developed and grown, have loved and lost and loved again. I’ve been married, divorced and remarried. I’ve lost some hair and gained some wrinkles. I’ve said goodbye to some old friends and hello to lots more new ones. I’ve seen some beautiful places as well as some ugly ones. I’ve laughed, cried, worried and raged. I’ve been a bastard and a saint, I’ve been conceited and kind. I’ve had more ups than downs (thankfully) and hope to continue this pattern. So far, I’m very happy with the life I’ve made and am working hard to continue on this path. I have no complaints so far. Life is for living and this is exactly what I’m doing.
