"Metrosexuals" piss me off!

from JoeUser Forums

Fresh off the "what gender is your brain?" thread.

I hate metrosexuals. I hate the whole concept.

I believe that, unless one is in a retro '80's, "hair band" or is wearing for stage purposes, makeup should not be applied to any part of a straight man's body. The same goes for hairspray, got it(ok, ok, punkers and goths can get special dispensation on this one, allright?). I want to be able to look at a person and have some idea if they are male or female, and, when gender is determined, whether they are straight or gay.

The problem with the metrosexual mentality is that it treats masculinity as something to be overcome; as a disease that must be cured by the "queer eye" crowd. An entire subculture of beer guzzling pooly playing MEN is being replaced by a bunch of wine cooler sipping pansies playing BRIDGE! And I, for one, think enough is enough, as I watch a football culture being replaced by white short wearing men with sweaters tied about their necks, yelling "Tennis anyone?" in their best lisp.

The American redneck is fast becoming an endangered species. I am hereby dedicating myself to the preservation of this magnificent creature, and am hoping each and every one of you will do the same. Otherwise, straight men of the future may well find themselves sitting at a bar grabbing the ass of a guy they REALLY THOUGHT was a girl. And the sad part is, the guy will be upset because he's straight.

If you are gay, hey, more power to you. Be flaming, enjoy yourselves. But please, men, if you are straight...STEP AWAY FROM THE CLINIQUE and give some attention to those freeweights rusting in your garage. The rest of us men will appreciate it.

1,811 views 18 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
I couldn't agree with you more. I've always enjoyed men just the way they are, I've never wanted to "change" them... it's sad. Real men are truly a dying breed.
The Political Machine 2024
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top

Dr. Guy,

That website frightens me!

Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
The types of cretins that follow these fads have always been with us and always will be. Next week, or month, or year they'll be doing something else just as silly while the rest of us continue on just as we always have; drinking beer, lifting weights, going fishing with "Bubba" and just generally being ourselves while scratching ourselves and belching the Star Spangled Banner for the amusement of our equally unrefined friends.

On a more serious note, I doubt these morons will ever replace real men in our mainstream culture.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top

That website frightens me!

Just be glad you are not trying to pick one of them up at a Bar!  Get it home and surprise!

Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
ewwwwww !!!

Gawd, I am so glad I'm married and not out "lookin", after checking the link posted by the good Dr Guy, I'd be in serious trouble........

As to the metro thing, pretty boys will forever support they're odepus complex....
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
12 outta 16...not TOO bad...

It's those 4 "misses" that would scare me if I were single.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
I live in levis, T shirts, both kinds, no underwear, and sneakers, altho I must admit i do wear cut off levis in the warm months with GASPPPPPPP sandles. I sport a huge old fashioned fu- mustashe, food included.
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
It's those 4 "misses" that would scare me if I were single.


Just apply the Crocodile Dundee check method.
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
I got 14 outta `16 and live in cali, where weird is a way of life, and If I were single and looking I would be rude and grab some crotch first. ha! rudeman strinkes again
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
I aint saying how many I got.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
50%, a couple of 'em I'd question the truth....
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
I dream of meeting a guy who would rather go to a museum than drink beer and watch football! I dated a really hot guy who didn't know much beyond a few big-dick jokes. I commented on some fireworks colors reminding me of the cobalt blue in Chartes Cathedral. He had no idea what I was talking about. In many ways, he was a redneck. I'll admit I might be a wierdo. But he started slamming me, using tacky sarcasm to put me down (his little edge over me). I dumped him and continue to miss the guy who loved listening to records and playing blues guitar and talking about politics and culture. He just made me feel better. But, honestly, I would not be surprised to find out he's gay. I don't like the red-neck type at all...don't know what the hell to talk about, but I see the point here. I feel like I need gay-dar, since all the attractive guys seem gay. They know how to get the girls, I guess.
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
As a girl, I'm not sure what "the rest of us men will apprecitate it" means. Are you threatened by metrosexuals because girls think they are good-looking and interesting?
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top

Are you threatened by metrosexuals because girls think they are good-looking and interesting?

...no, metrosexuals are POSERS and people pleasers. Believe me, I have NEVER been accused of not being interesting...

But, if you want some guy who spends more time on his hair than with you, go for it

(for the record, though...I rank going to a museum pretty much equal to drinking beer and watching football...after all, the museum's usually closed when I watch my football games...lol)

Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ah, I think metrosexuals have been around for a long time. Just look at the painting in the 1700's. Most men were wearing wigs because it was in.
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think the push towards more male grooming is a good thing. First of all, it gives the guys a taste of what we ladies go through, and second, some guys really do need some help.

Having said that, I don't want to be married to a chick with a penis. I need a guy who makes me feel safe and secure...and like I'm the pretty one.

Plucking the monobrow? Good. Clipping down the toenails? Good. Choosing clothes that flatter the male body? Good. His and hers manicure/pedicures? Bad. Man-purses? Bad. Lipgloss or clear nail polish on a dude? Bad.

David Duchovny? Good. Lance Bass? Bad.

Simple.
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
So you want someone with nice white good teeth that can take a punch in the mouth without losing them?