Suspeckted Suspeckted

Support the Patriarchy, Buy Her a Diamond!

Support the Patriarchy, Buy Her a Diamond!

I'm not sure if everyone reading this hears the same monotone radio ads for wedding/engagement rings that we have to put up with in Minnesota, but it seems like every other commercial on radio features the voice of some guy who sounds like he's at the end of his rope trying to sell me diamond jewelry. I recently noticed a number of billboards were making the same attempt, it's the pitch they were using that I find of interest, if not, offensive.

I believe the billboard was made by the A Diamond is Forever corporation whose website you can find here Link though you are able to scan through most of their ads I have not seen the one I'm about to describe on their site.

As I drove down the freeway I spotted a billboard with a large diamond ring in the center of it with the text "Just Imagine the Resolutions She'll Make." Now maybe I'm venturing to far on the overpolitically correct male feminist limb here but I think this is revolting. I can usually appreciate something borderline offensive if it was at least trying to make a joke...but I really don't think this was such an attempt.

So what resolutions will this "she" make if I buy her a diamond ring? Lose some weight, make me dinner, give me head while I count all the money I might be so persuaded to put towards buying her more diamonds? Okay, so that was my attempt at a joke. Really though, I think even the lesser offensive ads they feature cheapens both mens' and womens' roles in relationships/marriage by suggesting that women are going to do backflips on your command if you happen to have the money to buy them something as useless as a diamond, and that men are such bumbling slobs that there's no way they deserve the woman they have so they have to constantly be trying to make up for their lack of appreciation for their women by spending lots of money on them.....classic fear tactic.

Okay, let me cover my ass here. I completely understand why diamonds are used as the chosen stone of engagement/wedding rings...but that doesn't mean they need to be advertised in a way that completely misses the point of why someone would want to present their significant other with one.

If you find that after purchasing a piece of diamond jewelry to present to your wife/mother/fiance'/etc you're bubbling with joy over all the things you're going to get her to do for YOU when she gets it then please just walk in front of the next rapidly moving bus...or slowly, it might be more painful that way. The male species can do without you.

Love Suspeckted

PS - I didn't want to take the time to point out that many diamonds are mined in Sierra Leone where they are sold to support terrorist militia groups throughout the country who have slaughtered many civilians. There are many articles on this topic, but you can watch a video discussing it here. http://www.guerrillanews.com/videos/video.php?id=2


4,304 views 29 replies
Reply #26 Top
Here the commercials take the angle of making fun of the guy who bought too small of a diamond. It's disgusting, really.
Reply #27 Top

You know it's got potential when you've been looking forward to getting your 4x4 lifted for months and months, but when the time comes, you consider buying a diamond ring instead of getting the truck lifted... sacrifice... isn't that sometimes what love is about? 


I'm not saying it's gonna happen, but based on what I've seen so far, it's not out of the realm of possibility... I hope you're all thoroughly confused at this point...

Reply #28 Top

I'm not saying it's gonna happen, but based on what I've seen so far, it's not out of the realm of possibility... I hope you're all thoroughly confused at this point...


I'm not


We have plain white gold bands.  That's all we need.  I've never liked gaudy jewellry...I've always preferred the understated, simple kind.


He is talking about buying me an eternity ring for our 11th anniversary in january, though. That has diamonds in it.  After 3 kids, 11 years, 7 or 8 deployments (I can't recall the exact amount; there have been so many) and living the life of a detective's wife.......well, he thinks I deserve a diamond...


....and I'm inclined to agree with him.

Reply #29 Top

I'm not saying it's gonna happen, but based on what I've seen so far, it's not out of the realm of possibility... I hope you're all thoroughly confused at this point...


I'm not


We have plain white gold bands.  That's all we need.  I've never liked gaudy jewellry...I've always preferred the understated, simple kind.


He is talking about buying me an eternity ring for our 11th anniversary in january, though. That has diamonds in it.  After 3 kids, 11 years, 7 or 8 deployments (I can't recall the exact amount; there have been so many) and living the life of a detective's wife.......well, he thinks I deserve a diamond...


....and I'm inclined to agree with him.