Sex is Not That Big a Deal

Lets talk about sex baby.

from JoeUser Forums
I think sex is made into too big a deal in society. This coming from an early 20's male on the verge of graduating from college. My experience has shown me that guys take it way too seriously. I hate it when one of my friends has sex with someone and act like they won a gold medal. Then they tell their buddies, whom pretend to think they're supper cool cuz it fits the script. On top of that I know a few virgins who really hate being virgins and they day they get lucky, they're gona finally gain some confidence in themselves.

At the same token, females usually assume sex is what a guy understands and she's usually right. The way I've seen females tell a guy they like them is by bumping and grinding them on the dance floor. When a guy is on the recieving end of one of these rituals they usually expect something more latter on. What sucks is that the female is usually the one pressured into doing an act they might not really want to do, but society tells them that it's practically expected of them.
2,982 views 8 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
have you ever been getting ready with college girls, when they look in the mirror and say, "i'm getting laid tonight"?
if you talk to both genders individually you will find out that the way they view sex is mostly determined by the society they were raised in, and less by the way the opposite gender treats them.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
Hmmm...I'm 24, have been dating my boyfriend for a year and a half, and am a virgin, and will remain one until we marry. I'm not trying to be "holier than thou," this is just a choice I made a long time ago, and he made a long time ago, and we're sticking with it. We think its a big deal. I guess, other than my religious stance, that if I was intimate with someone that way, and the relationship didn't work out, I would completely beat myself up even more than I would otherwise. I don't know. I guess I think it is a big deal. There's too many babies out there unwanted and alone because "its not a big deal". There's too many young men and women dying or sick or infertile because "its not a big deal".

I don't expect anyone to feel the way I do...and that's fine. I just...made a decision about that aspect of my life when I was very young...and I don't regret it, just as many don't regret becoming sexually active either. Just my view.
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Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
Congrads Ratm4eva for having such a mature view of sex and being willing to speak out showing not all men within your age group are out for a booty call. Marcie I also say Kudo's to you and your partner for your choice on waiting. I feel it is quite important to have self~respect and control in regards to sharing the connection of sexual intimacy.

I am quite opinionate on this subject holding strong views although do not impose my personal choices on others yet will extend them in a debate when the discussion arises.

This certainly doesn't make me a prude nor frigid it just means I respect myself and believe that being uninhibabitated truly is freeing when your in a commited relationship feeling the security to be so free sharing in such a profound way no matter what your thing heh that turns you on may be.

Have a good day~

~Peace,Love(even the freakie kind if your commited in love and into that as long as it's legal ) HEalth & Happiness~
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
Thanks for the feedback so far. Marcie, I think it's more that young people are expected to have sex these days. A person is considered weird for chosing to wait until marriage, which is wrong. Lots of people choose to wait because there is an attachment that comes about with sex, and I think it's good. I think society pressures young people to have sex like in movies, TV shows and especially magazines. It becomes this thing they have to be doing it and they have to be good at it. What made me want to write this article, is that young people (and old) are often judged on their sexual habits, which should not be so.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
the way they view sex is mostly determined by the society they were raised in, and less by the way the opposite gender treats them.


I can agree and disagree with this statement. It would be difficult to separate these two out, as the way the opposite gender treats someone is often determined by the society, and the society is based on the way the opposite gender treats someone.

When guys are brought up to think it's cool to call themselves Pimps, and surround themselves with as many Ho's as possible, it's bound to have an affect, and not a good one. When girls are brought up to believe that they are nothing more than a prize piece of booty, and if she has a kid she better learn how to take care of it herself, the society is screwing itself.

I moved from a very small town in NW Pennsylvania to Long Island, NY between 4th and 5th grades. My naivete lasted about 2 weeks. I knew all about sex when I was 10 years old. I had friends who had started having sex when they were in 4th grade (both of them), and my best friend was proud of herself for waiting so long (she was 12 when she slept with her 15yr old boyfriend). This was much different than in the small town I moved from.

When a girl (or a guy I guess?) is treated a certain way by the opposite sex, that's what they come to expect, they believe that's the way they're supposed to be treated. It can make it difficult for them to have a good relationship, ever, if they've been treated wrong.
Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
Ladycleve I agree it's very disheartening yet I believe truly within my soul that if you are a strong individual and raised within a family that instills a strong value system it doesn't matter what your friends or community is doing regardless of the peer pressure involved. The way you are treated results on how you represent yourself. If you act like a slut,hos,hoochie is it really that surprising when your treated that way?

When you respect yourself and represent yourself in this way you will be treated this way and attract civilized people to you that will treat you this way. When your young of course people who represent themselves with respect are usually labeled the nerd,B, or weirdo by those who are ignorant or lack the confidence of going against the crowd.

As an adult the same holds true unfortunately.

But that's ok with me I personally feel good about who I am and if someone doesn't agree with my choices more power to them they are not me and can do and think what they wish.

I currently live in NW Pennsylvania and heh will soon be moving to Long Island starting a new path with my boyfriend who resides there so I also can relate to the differences in communities.

I'm not sure of your age but 12 having sex Wow that just makes me shudder I'm 31 and have a niece that is 13 I would have a heart attack if she was involved in an intimate relationship at such a young age.

~keep strong in your values and who you are always~

Have a good day.

~Peace,Love,Health & Happiness~
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
I had friends who had started having sex when they were in 4th grade (both of them), and my best friend was proud of herself for waiting so long (she was 12 when she slept with her 15yr old boyfriend). This was much different than in the small town I moved from.


If I ever have kids, which would take an Almighty accident, they are wearing chastity belts and bras (hell, both sexes) until they're 40!!!

I thought it was bad when a 14-year-old I met my first day of high school was bragging about her encounter that summer (not her first apparently).

*eyes wide with disbelief* 8(
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
CamMeg:
I am in my late 20's, I've been married since I was 19, and my husband was the first and only man I've ever slept with. How I managed to get through my teens in NY without giving in? Because I grew up in a home with very strong values, and I knew I was worth more than that--I had better self esteem and better support at home.

I recently heard a story of a 13 year old girl who was attacked and raped while walking home from school, by a 13 year old boy!!! This happened in a smaller town, and the police said that nothing would happen to the boy because of his age..............very sad for the girl and her family.

good luck with your move!