A GREAT Sadness upon My HEART

from JoeUser Forums

My Nephew Christopher the one I asked for prayers for his safety while he was In Iraq, came home on leave, he was due to go back to Kuwait yesterday, Upon awakening my Daughter Bobbi whom he was using as a rest stop between partying found his Uniforms left behind, everything else was gone.

His ambitions are apparent, he plans on running and not returning to Iraq, so far he will just be charged with Article 86 and maybe article 87 of the UCMJ. Article 86 is Unauthorized absence and article 87 is missing ships movement a coverall for missing your return flight too.

SIX days from now charges will be filed against him for this, 21 days later he will be classified a deserter in time of war.

Needless to say my entire family is stunned and deeply saddened by this turn of events.

The few combat vets in my family are hit the hardest about this, we all fought in different wars with honor and can not believe that one of us has done this. My phone has been ringing non-stop as if I have some kind of solution for this problem, well I don't, I wish I did, but the sad truth is only Christopher does. No one knows where he is or where he is going, no one saw this coming.

I have been in tears since yesterday and the tears continue to flow, my ex-wife is in such pain I cannot begin to tell you.

I ask G-D that he keeps his hand on Christopher's shoulder and that Christopher wakes up and realizes exactly what he has gotten himself in to.

Leavenworth will be where he serves his time if he goes past the 30 day mark, he will be discharged with a dishonorable, he will be stripped of his pay grade, and all pay and allowances, he will be facing a General Court Marshall, if he turns himself in before the 30 day period he will face a Summery Court Marshall, he will still be stripped of his rank, he might get away with just a undesirable discharge or a Bad conduct Discharge, while both are bad to have neither one is as devastating as a dishonorable discharge.

I ask for prayers for Christopher to do the right thing or what is most right in his situation.

For some reason I just cannot wrap my mind around that I just might have a DESERTER in my family. Selfish thought? yes it is, real? yes it is and I don't know what to do. I do not do helpless very well.

10,022 views 89 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
Awww, Elie. I am really sorry. I am hoping this is just a temporary lapse in judgment and he will make things right.

And please keep in mind that his actions are NOT a reflection on you. They speak only of HIS character.
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top

Wow!

I'm very sorry to read this news MM, and hope that your nephew contacts someone in the family and works things out before things worsen for him.

I feel horrible for anyone that is serving in Iraq (or Afghanistan, the forgotten war at this point) but am very thankful for their service and wish them all the best while they are in service.

I can also understand the fears that a young servicemember may have, and the concerns they may have about returning to service in the middle-east.  I assume that your nephew felt that he was imminent danger and that it was better to run than to go back, but I would hope that he can work things out with the military brass to return to service and finish up his commitment in some fashion.

Star Control: Origins
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)Texas WahineAugust 8, 2007 13:33:04


Awww, Elie. I am really sorry. I am hoping this is just a temporary lapse in judgment and he will make things right.


My knees are sore from praying that he snaps and wakes up and sees the kind of trouble he is in and the bigger trouble he is headed for.
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)little-whipAugust 8, 2007 13:33:59


It's easy to love somebody when they're doing right, but the true test is loving them through all their fuckups too, no matter how egregious.


Oh I still love him Sabrina, I never stop loving someone even when they do screw up, after all I live in a glass house.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top
Wow!
I'm very sorry to read this news MM, and hope that your nephew contacts someone in the family and works things out before things worsen for him.
I feel horrible for anyone that is serving in Iraq (or Afghanistan, the forgotten war at this point) but am very thankful for their service and wish them all the best while they are in service.


(Citizen)terpfan1980August 8, 2007 13:38:37

Thank you terp, BUT before he enlisted we {the combat vets} told him what he was headed for, we counciled him to wait till this thing settles down or we withdrew, but he with all the information went and enlisted anyways.

Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
I'll say a prayer for him that he realizes his whole life is ahead of him, and comes back soon.
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top
I don't know what to say. Hopefully, he will think about the consequences and decide to return.

I hope that it doesn't go to court martial but if it does the family should try to put together some funds for a civilian lawyer. It seems like the soldiers who have civilian lawyers do come out ahead. Maybe that would be a way for him to at least avoid the dishonorable discharge.
Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top

Gosh, Elie.  I'm sorry.  I can only hope that he realizes (SOON) that he's not solving anything by running away from it and that he's going to have to face the music sometime.  As you know, it'll be better for him to return now rather than later.

Article 86 is more common than Art.85, and when I was over at legal we threw at 87 at guys a fair bit too.  The best he can hope for is Art 86, AWOL.  I'll be praying that he doesn't get charged with desertion.

Chin up, Elie.  We're all praying in our own ways.

Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)Dr GuyAugust 8, 2007 13:55:58


I'll say a prayer for him that he realizes his whole life is ahead of him, and comes back soon.


thank you DocG, I keep hoping he will call me so I can give him some loving sound advise.
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)shadesofgreyAugust 8, 2007 14:03:48


Prayers for both you and Christopher -- and a big cyber hug for you!


I thank you Meg, here's hoping he comes to his senses and soon.{{{MEG}}}
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
LocamamaAugust 8, 2007 14:18:47


I don't know what to say. Hopefully, he will think about the consequences and decide to return.

I hope that it doesn't go to court martial but if it does the family should try to put together some funds for a civilian lawyer. It seems like the soldiers who have civilian lawyers do come out ahead. Maybe that would be a way for him to at least avoid the dishonorable discharge.


I( will make the funds available Amy, but if it goes to desertion in time of war he is fucked and royally.
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)dharmagrlAugust 8, 2007 14:21:07


Chin up, Elie. We're all praying in our own ways.


I thank you for this response D.
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
Wow, I'm sure this feels like a kick below the belt MM.

Sorry to hear that man.
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)Adventure-DudeAugust 8, 2007 16:05:48


Wow, I'm sure this feels like a kick below the belt MM.

Sorry to hear that man.


My entire family is in chaos, pain, sadness is all of our companions today, we keep asking each other "what is he thinking"?
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top
)little-whipAugust 9, 2007 07:55:18


Just checking back, any news from him yet, Elie?


My phone is strangly silent, although I just woke up after an awful night, there were no messages or missed calls logged on my cell. no news is bad news in this case. thank you for checking back whip.


MM
Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
My phone is strangly silent, although I just woke up after an awful night, there were no messages or missed calls logged on my cell. no news is bad news in this case. thank you for checking back whip.


Thanks for the update, MM. My heart goes out to you and your family during this time.

Last night I thought more about your possible perspective. You have a family member who is potentially going to ruin his life (if waits too long) and you sit there seeing it coming. As if that wasn't enough you have a 'missing' family member. You don't know where they are or where they went. Not knowing the health of them either. It makes my stomach sick like I was kicked in the nuts.

Many of us are here for you.
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
Many of us are here for you.


Amen. And Ditto.
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
Oh Ellie, I can't even imagine what you and your family are going through right now. Not knowing where he is, what he's doing or how he's doing. Not being able to talk to him to try to understand. Facing the heartache of his decisions with no other choice but to hope, pray and love him anyway.

I'll throw a few prayers your way and his. I do hope he turns himself in soon, for your peace of mind, for his honor and so that he doesn't have to spend his whole life looking over his shoulder.
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)Adventure-DudeAugust 9, 2007 13:24:52


Many of us are here for you.


This in itself is a blessing to have so many people CARE.
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
(Citizen)ParaTed2kAugust 9, 2007 14:07:29


Oh Ellie, I can't even imagine what you and your family are going through right now. Not knowing where he is, what he's doing or how he's doing. Not being able to talk to him to try to understand. Facing the heartache of his decisions with no other choice but to hope, pray and love him anyway.


Yes TED that is the crux of it, not only is he ruining his life, but he is causing so many people so much pain right now I almost cannot bear it.


Neither can my Ex-wife and that side of the family whcih I am still a large part of.

I'll throw a few prayers your way and his. I do hope he turns himself in soon, for your peace of mind, for his honor and so that he doesn't have to spend his whole life looking over his shoulder.


I have a plan in place if he gets in touch with anyone, the best of all possible outcomes will be if he turns himself in, in Kuwait at his jumping off station. This way he can say " I made a mistake and started to run, but saw it was not the right thing to do, so here I am reporting for duty and punishment" this will be the best of all situations.

Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
do you know for sure that he didn't go back.


maybe at the last moment he changed his mind. didn't have time to come back and get his uniforms.
Reply #23 from JoeUser Forums Top
So sorry to hear this, MM. I do feel for him...but I hope that he does turn himself in to prevent further troubles.


Reply #24 from JoeUser Forums Top
Damn. I understand exactly how you feel my friend. I pray that he will come to his senses quick enough to avoid too much trouble.
Reply #25 from JoeUser Forums Top
little-whipAugust 9, 2007 16:24:27


Hang in there, my friend. Know that you're on my mind.


thank you sabrina my friend.