the care and nurture of love
i miss you
from 
JoeUser Forums
JoeUser Forums
I love flowers. They don't always last long with me, but I love them. Both of these traits I got from my mother. She grew up on a farm and had a love of almost all living things, but especially flowers. As a result, we always had potted plants and vases of fresh flowers throughout the house. My mom didn't really have a green thumb, so we went through alot of plantings, but the greenery and flowers were always present.
When I got married, I had the desire to continue surrounding myself with nature's beauty, but at the same time, I didn't want to buy the flowers for myself. After all, that was my husband's job now, right? He was really good about buying me bouquets, but then they would sit in the vase on the entertainment center until they became moldy and began to stink. He would yell and demand to know why I hadn't thrown the rotten flowers away. I replied that he hadn't gotten me fresh ones to replace them yet. I explained that his responsibility was to keep me happy with a constant supply of fresh flowers. When the current vase started to die, it was time to get more.
He joined the military and we moved to California. We had a house with a yard for the first time. As part of his stress relief after work, he put in 7 small gardens, mostly for flowers, but some vegetables as well. We had several potted plants as well, mostly mini-roses. He would stop often on his way home at the Farmers Market and pick up roses for me, sometimes other flowers, but mostly roses as they're my favorite. I no longer left decaying flowers in vases around the house. Flowers were too easy and inexpensive to come by. If he hadn't gotten more, I replaced them. Sometimes we'd get home and we'd both have flowers for each other. We's just laugh, and I'd find a way to mix the two bouquets together into an appealing arrangement. Since he is so much more domestic than I am, and it helped him relieve stress to work on hobbies around the house, we ended up with flowers in a few other places as well. Like on the windows that he painted to look like stained glass,
and edible ones on the table in salads and other dishes when we had guests over.
In Texas, we bought a house, and then he left to go to Korea for a year. I lived by myself for the first time. I planted some flowers in the front yard, and a few in the back, including my all time favorite, a Joseph's Coat rose bush,
a color-changing flower that results in many different colored roses on the same bush. He sent me flowers at work a time or two, which boosted my spirits, but alas, I allowed myself to wallow in the pit of depression. The flowers died.
We moved to Ft. Hood, and our little bitty apartment didn't really allow us the opportunity of plants, but when we moved into another house, I started planting again. At one point I had about 30 potted plants. And then came the time when we were both working two jobs, followed by his return to the military and subsequent departure for training. I continued to work two jobs, three really if you counted everything I was involved in at church (3 separate activities). The flowers died.
We moved to Arizona, and lived way out in the boondocks near the border, surrounded by cactus and tumbleweeds. I had no intention of even trying flowers, but I was given an Ivy plant as a welcome gift by my boss' wife. Things were difficult in so many ways, and yet, the plant is still alive. In fact, I had gotten several flowers last month intending to plant them out front and hadn't gotten around to it yet, though I have watered them, and they're all still alive as well.
I've been trying to figure out what the difference has been in all of these situations, and I think I've figured it out. You're probably going to think this is weird, but the difference is our relationship. I thought maybe it was stress, because that seemed to be pretty constant with the earlier situations, but that's not all it is. When our relationship is stronger, my thumb is so green it's not even funny. But when we've been struggling, or fighting, everything around us suffers. I imagine there are some that would laugh the connection off as imagination, but it is real. You have to take the time to truly care for and nurture flowers, just as you do a relationship, and love. If you are struggling with one, chances are you will be with the other. And if you work at it, you get better and it gets easier as you go along. I'm not sure that I've improved, but my husband sure has. He has learned how to nurture a relationship from half-way round the world. Not a day goes by that I don't know I'm loved.
I already posted pics of the gorgeous red roses he sent me earlier this week. When I talked to him last, I gushed about how beautiful they are and how thoughtful it was of him. He responded by telling me to let him know when they die, so he can send me more.....
When I got married, I had the desire to continue surrounding myself with nature's beauty, but at the same time, I didn't want to buy the flowers for myself. After all, that was my husband's job now, right? He was really good about buying me bouquets, but then they would sit in the vase on the entertainment center until they became moldy and began to stink. He would yell and demand to know why I hadn't thrown the rotten flowers away. I replied that he hadn't gotten me fresh ones to replace them yet. I explained that his responsibility was to keep me happy with a constant supply of fresh flowers. When the current vase started to die, it was time to get more.
He joined the military and we moved to California. We had a house with a yard for the first time. As part of his stress relief after work, he put in 7 small gardens, mostly for flowers, but some vegetables as well. We had several potted plants as well, mostly mini-roses. He would stop often on his way home at the Farmers Market and pick up roses for me, sometimes other flowers, but mostly roses as they're my favorite. I no longer left decaying flowers in vases around the house. Flowers were too easy and inexpensive to come by. If he hadn't gotten more, I replaced them. Sometimes we'd get home and we'd both have flowers for each other. We's just laugh, and I'd find a way to mix the two bouquets together into an appealing arrangement. Since he is so much more domestic than I am, and it helped him relieve stress to work on hobbies around the house, we ended up with flowers in a few other places as well. Like on the windows that he painted to look like stained glass,
and edible ones on the table in salads and other dishes when we had guests over.In Texas, we bought a house, and then he left to go to Korea for a year. I lived by myself for the first time. I planted some flowers in the front yard, and a few in the back, including my all time favorite, a Joseph's Coat rose bush,
a color-changing flower that results in many different colored roses on the same bush. He sent me flowers at work a time or two, which boosted my spirits, but alas, I allowed myself to wallow in the pit of depression. The flowers died.We moved to Ft. Hood, and our little bitty apartment didn't really allow us the opportunity of plants, but when we moved into another house, I started planting again. At one point I had about 30 potted plants. And then came the time when we were both working two jobs, followed by his return to the military and subsequent departure for training. I continued to work two jobs, three really if you counted everything I was involved in at church (3 separate activities). The flowers died.
We moved to Arizona, and lived way out in the boondocks near the border, surrounded by cactus and tumbleweeds. I had no intention of even trying flowers, but I was given an Ivy plant as a welcome gift by my boss' wife. Things were difficult in so many ways, and yet, the plant is still alive. In fact, I had gotten several flowers last month intending to plant them out front and hadn't gotten around to it yet, though I have watered them, and they're all still alive as well.
I've been trying to figure out what the difference has been in all of these situations, and I think I've figured it out. You're probably going to think this is weird, but the difference is our relationship. I thought maybe it was stress, because that seemed to be pretty constant with the earlier situations, but that's not all it is. When our relationship is stronger, my thumb is so green it's not even funny. But when we've been struggling, or fighting, everything around us suffers. I imagine there are some that would laugh the connection off as imagination, but it is real. You have to take the time to truly care for and nurture flowers, just as you do a relationship, and love. If you are struggling with one, chances are you will be with the other. And if you work at it, you get better and it gets easier as you go along. I'm not sure that I've improved, but my husband sure has. He has learned how to nurture a relationship from half-way round the world. Not a day goes by that I don't know I'm loved.
I already posted pics of the gorgeous red roses he sent me earlier this week. When I talked to him last, I gushed about how beautiful they are and how thoughtful it was of him. He responded by telling me to let him know when they die, so he can send me more.....