How not to confront someone
an overheard conversation
from 
JoeUser Forums
JoeUser Forums
Yesterday on the bus, I overheard a guy talking on his cell phone. I never knew a guy could be so chatty, on the entire trip he was talking loudly, trying to counsel his friend on how to confront a project teammate.
Now I wasn't exactly eavesdropping, since this guy was talking like there wasn't anyone around. It's funny how phone conversations can do that to you when you are totally engaged. That, or that people are still used to shouting into their cell phones even though these days, cell phone mikes are sensitive or even 'smart' enough to pick out and enhance your voice amidst the noise in the background. If your cell phone can't do that, it's time to get a new phone.
On to the funny part of the conversation::
Guy on phone: I don't think accidentally forwarding the email will work. You should confront him in first person.
Friend on the other line: ...
Guy on phone: I think you should just come out and say it. I think he can tell that you forwarded the email to him accidentally on purpose.
Imagine this: You get an email criticizing you and find that it was replied to you and forwarded to someone else as well. This email is not addressing you, it is addressing you as a third person (i.e. 'he' or 'she'). In essence, even if you didn't think it was on purpose, the sender comes across as a backstabber. Also, other addressees on the email may also think that sender is a backstabber or a careless idiot for not paying attention to the address line. Lose-lose situation. How stupid is this stupid?
Now I wasn't exactly eavesdropping, since this guy was talking like there wasn't anyone around. It's funny how phone conversations can do that to you when you are totally engaged. That, or that people are still used to shouting into their cell phones even though these days, cell phone mikes are sensitive or even 'smart' enough to pick out and enhance your voice amidst the noise in the background. If your cell phone can't do that, it's time to get a new phone.
On to the funny part of the conversation::
Guy on phone: I don't think accidentally forwarding the email will work. You should confront him in first person.
Friend on the other line: ...
Guy on phone: I think you should just come out and say it. I think he can tell that you forwarded the email to him accidentally on purpose.
Imagine this: You get an email criticizing you and find that it was replied to you and forwarded to someone else as well. This email is not addressing you, it is addressing you as a third person (i.e. 'he' or 'she'). In essence, even if you didn't think it was on purpose, the sender comes across as a backstabber. Also, other addressees on the email may also think that sender is a backstabber or a careless idiot for not paying attention to the address line. Lose-lose situation. How stupid is this stupid?
