Waiters demanding restaurant biz make 20 pct tips mandatory

For the record, if I go to a place with exceptional service, I tip that way. If I go to a place with even half-decent service, I tip well. My grandmother was a waitress for years. My mother did the same work when I was much younger. I know how hard wait staff normally work, but I also know that I expect to be treated with respect and get a fair level of service.

I shouldn't have to flag down a waiter to get refills on my drinks, I shouldn't have to sit staring at a dirty plate when my party has finished their meals, and I shouldn't be left waiting forever for the check or for the waiter to return with my credit card and the check after they give it to me the first time. Simple rules, but ones that many waiters seem to ignore.

Greet guests in a timely fashion and be courteous and up beat when you do.
Mention the specials if you must to appease your managers and establishment owners.
Try to upsell me if you want but don't get mad about me ordering something less expensive that I'd rather have.
If my meal is taking a while be sure to check back and let me know it'll be out of the kitchen soon.
When you serve the meal, if not before, bring extra napkins so I'll be able to wipe fingers and keep myself cleaner and neater.
After you serve the meal give me a few minutes to taste it and then check back to see if everything is good.
Once the majority of the plates on my table are clean or look as if my party has finished with, check back to see if we'd like something else after the meal and don't be mad if we say no thanks.
Bring the check in a timely fashion, and bring it back again once you've processed the credit card.

Simple rules, but I swear most of the wait staff I encounter out there seems clueless about a lot of them. Napkins are a nuisance as are straws or utensils (that should have already been at the table....) I don't exist until the food gets to the table and invariably something I asked to have left off or added to the order isn't there. Just lame little deficiencies that I'll deduct from as I process the tip amount when I'm signing the credit slip or pulling the bills from my pocket to pay in cash.

For the record, read Waiterrant.net.  He does not demand it.  Not all are demanding it.  Oh, he gets the chintzers as do all of them.  But I agree, tips should be based on service.  I have tipped as much as 50% when the service was that good.  And as little as 5% when it sucked (I always leave one so they know that I did not forget).  if they demand 20%?  Fine.  I have a lot of other places to frequent.

Basically, Waiters/Waitresses are on commission.  Like a car salesman.  There is no set amount.  You dont like it?  Dont sell cars (or wait tables).  Get a salaried job.

P.s.  One time we went to our favorite restaurant, but did not get our favorite waitress.  Instead we got a new kid.  The son of one of our favorite waitresses.  She knew us and told us he was new.  And he was!  Very over attentive!  But fine!  I gave him 25%, and called his mother over and told her that he was a little too attentive, but not really any complaints.

They still treat us very well there, and she does most of all.  If you have a favorite, they know.  And they make sure they take care of you because of your patronage.

I agree with doc, if you do not want to work for comm and tips and find your level of earnings insufficient, then get a salaried job.

As a rule I will always leave 10%, HOWEVER, if the service was really bad I leave a 20p on the table to get the message across - it acts like a veritable slap in the face! Walking out with a frown and stopping at the desk on the way out to inform management is also a part of the 20p deal!

Tipping should not be enforced as a surcharge, that pisses me off. The restaurant owner has a responsiblity to pay wages from his turnover, not from my pocket over and above!

Increase tipping to 20% and enforce it as a surcharge, a lot of average joe families out there will not be able to afford to patronise the industry and so the industry will suffer.

Consumers fight back - a few weeks of boycotting should do the trick - not very realistic I know - but the thought tickles me pink! How quickly they would back track!

I'm one who regularly tips well for great service, but if they demand 20% fine... that's all they'll get. The sad thing is people will quit leaving an extra tip because it is already taken out... which will reward the incompetent and hurt the exceptional. Which is what usually happens when demands are made in any market.

Making a mandatory tip? At 20 percent?! Why not just demand a 20% increase to the base charge of all meals and add that to the waiters' salaries (if they want to drive off their patronage and anger almost every consumer), instead of this 'tip' nonsense?

More inspiration to have meals at home.

P.s. One time we went to our favorite restaurant, but did not get our favorite waitress. Instead we got a new kid. The son of one of our favorite waitresses. She knew us and told us he was new. And he was! Very over attentive! But fine! I gave him 25%, and called his mother over and told her that he was a little too attentive, but not really any complaints. They still treat us very well there, and she does most of all. If you have a favorite, they know. And they make sure they take care of you because of your patronage.

Funny you bring up that story... a few years ago, at a different place of my own employment, myself and some co-workers used to frequent (not on any fixed schedule, but I'd say 3 - 4 times a month) a Bennigans. One waitress in particular there was *always* good. We learned very quickly to ask for seating in her area and she was always happy to see us since we'd tip well and were always very easy to deal with.

I've done similar things at areas where I know I'll be back, enjoyed the service, etc. It doesn't take me that many trips to a place to figure out who provides good service and who doesn't. Treat me well and I'll do the same.

From the other side of this coin, when I was a waiter there were things we had to do for the restaurant that did not generate tips. I often wondered, how does rolling silverware into napkins supposed to generate tips? Not only doesn't it, but it keeps the waitstaff off the tables where they CAN generate tips. If the host's basket ran out of silverware then they had to do the rolling, so I guess we are supposed to believe that rolled silver is worth $10/hr for hosts but only $2.50/hr if waiters to it? ;~D

(((btw, for those who will go there, yes, I understood the terms of my employment when I accepted the job, so yes, I rolled silver for the agree upon $2.50... I did it, so now I can whine about it.. so there!)) :~D

While I know there are cheapskates out there that don't tip, or don't tip well, but I think the majority of us do tip well for good service and this sort of nonsense will likely just create less motivation for service staff to provide excellent service. Why would they go out of their way to do an above average job if they already know they''ll get the tip regardless?

I would simply refuse to patronize any establishment that instituted such a policy.

I had a wonderful lamb dinner about 5 years ago in Croatia. The place looked like some resturant in a James Bond film, quite fancy with an ocean view. My party practically had the place to ourselves, only two other sets of couples were there. The meal (5 courses) was very cheap by US standards, about $15 per person. When we tried to tip the waiter (an older man 40-50ish) he looked so embarassed and tried to give our tip money back, The service was impecable, so we insisted. He finally gave in and accepted the gratuity. I've encountered this many times outside the US, tips are just not expected. Interesting how service jobs have evolved here in the US.

"I've encountered this many times outside the US, tips are just not expected. Interesting how service jobs have evolved here in the US."

Apparently tips won't be expecting very much longer here in the States either... they will be demanded.

I have to say some states are egregious in what they legalize as the minimum wage for service staff which forces an overdependence on the only thing under their control- the tip.

Not mentioning, though, that many waiters do the bare minimum and expect what's considered a tip for better than average service (20%). Although that's not any different than what many people do for a salary.

Last but not least, this leaves a circumstance that's ripe for exploitation by the food service industry as well as cheapskate diners.

P.S. (Puts on flame retardant suit) As a gross generalization, the patrons that I found to be the highest maintenance/lowest tipping were 2 or more women. They ruled when it came to: "I want it on the side", "Can you prepare it this way?", "One more question...", and "Well, they did it for me last time". Then after all of that, each would dissect the check like a CPA and leave a pile of coins for a tip. Meanwhile there was always a lady or two paying for more than their fair share whereupon others in the group would subsume it as their own contribution and therefore further reduce the tip. Even when I ran a bar, I ran into the same mentality (or others trying to exchange the sultry smile and a lowcut blouse for a beer).

So you can blame the server, if you like, but keep in mind that my motto was to give the same great service to all EVERYTIME and let the chips fall where they may.

Hey great article. Best one of the day. I argree with you but I do not tip at all. period! I live in China where tipingis not part of ffthe service. In some places they charge 15% and you must pay it. Where it goes hell maybe to the boss but guess he puts it with the pay of the waiteress. The hotels do this one but outside oof this no no tipping. The same in Japan S Korea and Taiwan where Ihave lived and worked. Think it is great.

True tips should be from the customer and that is it my friend., If you do not like the job then get the hell out and do something different.

P.S. (Puts on flame retardant suit) As a gross generalization, the patrons that I found to be the highest maintenance/lowest tipping were 2 or more women

You should read waiterrant.net!  He says the same thing.

A 20% tip is outrageous, and should ONLY be given for EXCELLENT service. If they begin demanding it, I will simply cease eating out!

I agree that a mandatory 20% is outrageous. Lobby for a better wage, by all means, but it's not fair to the customer to make the amount of the tip mandatory. I can remember being shocked when I was very young when my father left a poor tip for a waiter who had been slow. My father told me that tip means "To Insure Promptness". Whether it really did mean that or not, it's stuck with me. I will usually leave 10% even if the service is extremely poor, mostly out of a probably misplaced sense of guilt. I generally do leave 20% unless the service was poor, but I want it to be a mark of my approval (or disapproval) of the waiter's service.

I can understand if they add say an automatic 15% gratuity to parties of 7 or more, because it makes the waiter's job more difficult, particularly if they don't get another waiter to help them, and in that situation I will usually add to the 15% unless the waiter is negligent.

20% used to mean something. It used to mean that you were exceptionally pleased with the service. Now it's taken for granted that you will (or should) leave 20%.

mandatory anything is outrageous. i refuse to submit to an automatic gratuity in any establishment. and i spent some time bartending and managing a bar back in my college days. i also cooked a little and waited on my share of tables. with that being said, here are my policies...

1) i never tip below a dollar. tipping change is an insult. even if i'm gettin a 75 cent happy hour drink, i'll leave a buck (and probably the quarter if it came fast) for the service.

2) on a meal, 20% is min. for me, with rare exception. if the service is excellent, i've been known to leave up to a 50% tip. in the event i do get what i consider poor service which i'll detail below , i will leave less than 20%, sometimes down to 10%. BUT if i do that, i always speak with the server and explain my beef, politely. i usually will also explain my above "usual" policies. if i liked the food at least, or have a reason to come back (sometimes ya gotta go places other people like or have biz. meetings, etc...) i have never found myself getting poor service twice.

poor service to me includes, but may not be limited to the following...

1) forgetting about me or my party.
2) moving like it's not busy, when it is and making me feel like i don't matter
3) rudeness, but i got a pretty thick skin and broad sense of humor, so it takes a lot to offend me, esp in person, lol.
4) if i suspect any "tampering" with my food, but if that's the case, the issue is usually brought up before the bill comes, before i eat, hopefully, lol.

i do try not to hold the following against a server...

1) if i have a beef, and take it up with the manager, as long as the server didn't give me a hard time, if the manager doesn't resolve the issue to my satisfaction (which usually isn't his cheapest, company policy method of offerin a free dessert way too often) i still leave a proper tip for the working person, letting the manager know how i won't be back.
2) bad food,,,as long as they didn't have a hand in cooking it
3) slowness if the place is busy and i feel they are doing their best. this esp. comes into play when i have a new or training server, which happens,,,and hey, we've all been the new guy at some point...so i tend to be a little more forgiving in those cases. as long as the server appears to give a damn, and is trying their best, i try to be generous.
4) any other issue which the server is in no control of. like a bad or obnoxious customer close by. or something else annoying ,like ya got seated by the AC vent (but that was the only table at peak time).

of course, nothing is written in stone, but i do try to be as nice as possible as i am just someone who appreciates someone working hard for me. it's sad that everyone isn't, or in some cases can't be as generous, promting the industry to have (bad, imho) reactions like this. a case can be made for a more "living wage" environment in the biz, but how would that affect prices? i do believe the industry at least should get a bump up a little more than they do get. their "special lil sub min. wage category" is a little ridiculous. maybe, since they are tipped, the burden should't be on the resturaunt owners exclusively, as that may affect prices in a way that impacts overall business. maybe their min wage should at least be in the 4.50 - 5.50 buck range, if the min wage overall is at 7.25 or so. their time, their efforts outside of serving food (and anyone in the biz knows everyone pitches in at a lot of things that aren't in their "job description") is very undervalued in the industry as a whole, and should change a little, at least.

one more thing,,,if someone you know works in a place, and you go there, and they give you free or discounted stuff...always leave a HUGE TIP. if a bartender friend hooks me up with 20 or 30 bucks worth of free booze / food, i would tip at least 50% on that alone. then tip on what was paid for too.

I've been on both ends of this equation, having been both waiter (no PC terms here, thanks) and waitee.  When waitering, I knew that if I gave good service, I'd get a tip.  Even if things went wrong in the kitchen, if I came out to bat (so to speak) for my guests, I knew they'd appreciate that and tip accordingly.

I got $100 once.  From a professional snooker (billiards) player from the UK.

I think that the tip offset some places deduct from the hourly wage might be behind this demand.....

I read many of you saying that if the person doesn't like the job because it pays so little, move on, more easily said than done, especially when you don't know under what circumstances that person is working there. Just a point.


I don't agree with customers being held for ransom, almost, if this does happen. Most places already charge mandatory gratuity if you're 4, 5 or more anyway. Plus another thing is when they do add the tip to your bill, and you don't notice and you tip again. That's double dipping!


Good service deserves good tips, bad service, very low, or nothing at all if the server and service was just plain bad.

oh, and btw, I've even left a nickel ;~D

Of course the server in Croatia would not exept your tip. They do not have the system that is developed here, in US. Their servers ger salaries and do not depend on tips. Nowadays though a lot of Eastern European countries are starting to accept the tipping system.
Gotta say one thing. I manage a restaurant. Once in a while I do some serving as well if we are too busy and not ready for it. I give impeccable service. I know that. (Let me put it this way: my husband married me because he was impressed with my service and came back for me). As well as my GM told me that he gets the most e-mails about my great service, not my servers (even though I serve occasionally). The point is: a lot of people just do not have it in their family that they have to tip. No matter how good the service might be, they'l still leave you less then 10%. And then ask for a corporate e-mail to give me a compliment. But I am not Mother Theresa!

I tip based on my service.  If I get real good service I have no problem tipping more than I should.  However, as someone who used to go out a lot I can say service has become horrible. 

I am not one to complain, but I have found myself speaking to the General Manager of two restaurants in the last couple of months because of terrible service.

My family and I sat down and was not even acknowledge for over 25 minutes, while the "server" walked by us about 10 times.