Gravity Boots, Cows, & Maternity Clothes
from 
JoeUser Forums
JoeUser Forums
Can someone tell a pregnant woman how to put gravity boots to good use?
What's that you say...? Best to just leave them in the box for awhile? That's what I thought too.
So much for getting any use out of my sole birthday present. But it was thoughtful of my husband, seeing as there are about 3 times a year when I'm begging him to put my back into alignment by holding me upside down by my ankles for a few minutes.
OK, so I have begged for gravity boots too. In my more athletic frame of being, it sounded like a good idea at the time.
Yesterday my husband asked if he could try it out. I was thrilled to watch him up there. He looks so athletic.
Here's a picture. (For the sake of modesty, I digitally "dressed" him and my son for you. It was a lazy evening...who actually wears clothes around the house anyway? ... YOU do? *Blush* )
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I got a b-day voice message from my wonderful friend Dana! Ooh, I ought to call her back. And a card from a long-lost friend. I was so glad to hear from both of them.
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We were driving into town and passed a herd of cows...I did a double-take because they were all lined up head-to-butt in a single file, with no human there to have told them to get that way. I told my husband that they must be rehearsing for a musical or something. They'd call it "COWS" (you know, a take-off on "CATS"). Then he said, "It would be a Moo-sical." I didn't hear him say that, but I laughed outrageously at myself anyway for thinking of such a thing. But my husband's comment was funnier, once he clued me in. "Moo-sical." HA!
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And now an ode to maternity clothes.
Can you believe all this time I've been getting huger, doubting that maternity clothes could do anything to help make me more comfortable? Last time I was pregnant I didn't bother with them at all. I was sure they were just a money-making scheme. Just wear huge clothes, I always figured.
(Of course this is coming from a lady who, until fairly recently, didn't realize that mixed vegetables came in cans AND in the frozen section. I honestly thought I'd come up with a brilliant idea to buy the vegetables separately and mix them together myself.)
Well today my hubby bought me a few articles of maternity clothing...and WOW....they fit. And they fit marvellously.
Can you believe all this time I've been wearing my old clothes having resigned myself to the fact that I'm huge and oddly-shaped and it was my fault and there was nothing anyone could do to help me?
Well I'm wearing these shorts right now and 1) they're NOT ugly; 2) they actually fit around the waist and butt; 3) they're NOT riding up in the crotch like all my other pants & shorts have been doing; and 4) for once I didn't strip naked to get into my pajamas as soon as we got home.
Aaaah. I'm comfortable AND dressed in a socially-acceptable manner. It's been a long time since those planets lined up.
What's that you say...? Best to just leave them in the box for awhile? That's what I thought too.
So much for getting any use out of my sole birthday present. But it was thoughtful of my husband, seeing as there are about 3 times a year when I'm begging him to put my back into alignment by holding me upside down by my ankles for a few minutes.
OK, so I have begged for gravity boots too. In my more athletic frame of being, it sounded like a good idea at the time.
Yesterday my husband asked if he could try it out. I was thrilled to watch him up there. He looks so athletic.
Here's a picture. (For the sake of modesty, I digitally "dressed" him and my son for you. It was a lazy evening...who actually wears clothes around the house anyway? ... YOU do? *Blush* )
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
I got a b-day voice message from my wonderful friend Dana! Ooh, I ought to call her back. And a card from a long-lost friend. I was so glad to hear from both of them.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
We were driving into town and passed a herd of cows...I did a double-take because they were all lined up head-to-butt in a single file, with no human there to have told them to get that way. I told my husband that they must be rehearsing for a musical or something. They'd call it "COWS" (you know, a take-off on "CATS"). Then he said, "It would be a Moo-sical." I didn't hear him say that, but I laughed outrageously at myself anyway for thinking of such a thing. But my husband's comment was funnier, once he clued me in. "Moo-sical." HA!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
And now an ode to maternity clothes.
Can you believe all this time I've been getting huger, doubting that maternity clothes could do anything to help make me more comfortable? Last time I was pregnant I didn't bother with them at all. I was sure they were just a money-making scheme. Just wear huge clothes, I always figured.
(Of course this is coming from a lady who, until fairly recently, didn't realize that mixed vegetables came in cans AND in the frozen section. I honestly thought I'd come up with a brilliant idea to buy the vegetables separately and mix them together myself.)
Well today my hubby bought me a few articles of maternity clothing...and WOW....they fit. And they fit marvellously.
Can you believe all this time I've been wearing my old clothes having resigned myself to the fact that I'm huge and oddly-shaped and it was my fault and there was nothing anyone could do to help me?
Well I'm wearing these shorts right now and 1) they're NOT ugly; 2) they actually fit around the waist and butt; 3) they're NOT riding up in the crotch like all my other pants & shorts have been doing; and 4) for once I didn't strip naked to get into my pajamas as soon as we got home.
Aaaah. I'm comfortable AND dressed in a socially-acceptable manner. It's been a long time since those planets lined up.
: And rather than using Photoshop, which I don't have, it was a 10-minute quickie on good ol' Microsoft Paint. (Cheesy, I know.) I just painted on a shirt for him real quick (his man-boobs were a bit shocking even to me) then some itty-bitty shorts for our little boy who's always taking off his clothes. Never can keep that boy dressed for long.
The maternity clothes, well I shopped for them and he dropped the cash...I guess I said "he bought them for me" because I'm still extremely sensitive of the fact that he pays for everything I have. So if I were to say, "I just bought some new clothes!" I would be lying :