“Watch it nigg—”

from JoeUser Forums
There I was in the grocery isle frantically searching for ice cream, a flavor I know my oldest girl would love. Cause we were giving her a surprise birthday celebration. I had my two youngest with me but they were ahead of me held captivated by the variety of ice pops in the refrigerator.

A group of guys and gals came into the isle, laughing and jostling each other playfully. They were trying busy talking. I noticed them but I didn’t notice them, if you know what I mean. {for the uninitiated, I looked at them with my side vision (yea, I have super powers!LOL!) this to make sure they were not a problem to me or mine and went back to my business.

Then I heard one of them said “Hey watch it you nigger” and laughed. One of them admonished, “Hey don’t use that word”, I felt the looks in my direction, but I pretended not to see them or hear….why, because I’m not one to blow things out of proportion and I decided IT wasn’t important enough for me to get uptight about. Cause you see, I decided that I was going to put a pin in that bubble. That word which is being thrown around by one and all, used freely with fondness and familiarity. Why am I going to give it props, or credentials? Nawwwww…plus by the sound of it, they used it quite often between them. So often and familiar it seemed, it just slipped out while they were out amongst the public folks.

So no drama, no hissing of the teeth from me. I moved on with my business glimpsing the perplexed and hesitant looks with my side vision. I laughed softly to myself, scurrying my brood forward cause I’ve got a celebration to do. Bet they didn’t expect that! Hehee…neither did you!
misc
6,994 views 22 replies
Reply #1 from JoeUser Forums Top
I expected it Forever because you are such a lady.

What a gracious thing to do.

My opinion of you only grows with every post like this!
Reply #2 from JoeUser Forums Top
My opinion of you only grows with every post like this!


That's sweet Tonya! Thank you!
Offworld Trading Company
Reply #3 from JoeUser Forums Top
My opinion of you only grows with every post like this!


I completely agree.Good for you deciding not to let it get to you. There are way too many rude and inconsiderate jerks out there to let them get to you everytime. You obviously are a very happy person to not let stupid people drag you down. You are truely amazing!
Reply #4 from JoeUser Forums Top
One of them admonished, “Hey don’t use that word”,


In this simple statement, there is hope.
Reply #5 from JoeUser Forums Top

I was going to yell "why not", but then read Tova's comment, and have to agree.  You are the perfect lady ( and well suited for any southern society).

Me?  I am just a class A bung hole, and I would have told them to stick a cork in it!

You may be Jamican by birth, but you are Southern by actions and deeds!  Dont leave the south!  It would be a shame for us to have to mount a rescue party to bring you back!

Reply #6 from JoeUser Forums Top
Just the idea that someone would use that particular word in your presence makes my blood boil.
Reply #7 from JoeUser Forums Top
BTW have fun at your daughter's party! Happy birthday to her
Reply #8 from JoeUser Forums Top

Happy, Happiest Birthday to your daughter!

And hats off to you for handling a situation so superbly!  I need to take lessons from you forever  

Reply #9 from JoeUser Forums Top
I completely agree.Good for you deciding not to let it get to you.


Thx Jenny! Life's too short anyway and it's too darn hot outside! Blowing a blood vessel isn't a good thing too!!


One of them admonished, “Hey don’t use that word”,In this simple statement, there is hope.


I agree Gid. At least they realised that. I guess when you become accostom to saying things to your friends you don't realise that it's not OK until you realise someone else will be offended by it.


Me? I am just a class A bung hole, and I would have told them to stick a cork in it!


No you're not!


You may be Jamican by birth, but you are Southern by actions and deeds! Dont leave the south! It would be a shame for us to have to mount a rescue party to bring you back!


Thx Philip, that's very nice of you to say!


Just the idea that someone would use that particular word in your presence makes my blood boil.


I know Elie...but like I said, it's what they seem to do often becuase of how it was said. They didn't do it desparingly I thought because they were playing with each other but they do use it often to each other.

BTW have fun at your daughter's party! Happy birthday to her


Thx Jenny, we did!
Reply #10 from JoeUser Forums Top
Happy, Happiest Birthday to your daughter!


Thx Trudy! She's 17 now!


And hats off to you for handling a situation so superbly! I need to take lessons from you forever


Hehe, I guess I could teach you something.! Lot's of patience and an ability to read people on the fly!
Reply #11 from JoeUser Forums Top
When a person (especially a stranger!) hurls an insult at you and you become upset by it, then at that moment they own you.

I'm glad you chose freedom.
Reply #12 from JoeUser Forums Top
A very mature way to go. I suppose it just shows who the better person was there doesn't it? Way to go.
Reply #13 from JoeUser Forums Top
Nice post FS, you know you ROCK dont you?
Reply #14 from JoeUser Forums Top
know you ROCK dont you?


I agree.

I believe the only one who can give power to a word is the one most offended by it. You gave it absolutely no power whatsoever. Good on you.
Reply #15 from JoeUser Forums Top
My Mom told me "sometimes it's best to ignore a situation / comment - after all - people have the right to make a fool out of themselves - no need to help them along".
Good for you!
Reply #16 from JoeUser Forums Top

My Mom told me "sometimes it's best to ignore a situation / comment - after all - people have the right to make a fool out of themselves - no need to help them along".

You have been popping around with great comments.  You really should join.  YOu have a lot to offer. And so far, all of it at least thoughtful or better, great.

Reply #17 from JoeUser Forums Top
I think what one has to consider is that this isn't mean as an insult 90% of the time now. I have heard the 'n' word a handful of times in public in the last few months, and every single time has either been quote from rap music, or the Dave Chappelle show. I can't remember the last time I heard it said in racist terms.

Granted, people should be sensitive to the fact that people still take it the other way, and I don't excuse people who toss it around. On the other hand maybe it is time to look at how often the word is used in popular culture with no insulting connotations at all.

So when I hear friends, white or black, talking to each other in public and one says 'Oh, n--- please.', I know exactly where it came from. I don't think they intend it as a racial slur any more than people who say "I'm rich beeeyatch" mean to disparage women. I think a lot of hurt feelings could be spared if people would hear things in context.
Reply #18 from JoeUser Forums Top
You are such a lady and an incredible example on knowing when to say when. (That made sense in my head)

I hope the party was great and the ice cream delicious.
Reply #19 from JoeUser Forums Top
Some, not all, kids are so neive these days. You should hear some of the racial slurs that come out of the mouths of my elementary school kids. I don't think they know what they are saying half of the time.

I hope the party was fun!!! MMM ice cream!
Reply #20 from JoeUser Forums Top
Reply By: Shovelheat


Reply By: MasonM


Reply By: island_gurl12


Reply By: dynamaso


Reply By: Feisty_in_ohio(Anonymous User)


Reply By: KellyW.


Reply By: little-whip


Reply By: alison watkins


Thank you guys for your comments. I'm glad I chose to not react. Sometimes I guess you have to just know which battles are better to fight, so I agree with that. You guys rock too! Thanks for putting a smile on my face!



Reply By: Dr. GuyPosted: Thursday, July 06, 2006My Mom told me "sometimes it's best to ignore a situation / comment - after all - people have the right to make a fool out of themselves - no need to help them along".You have been popping around with great comments. You really should join. YOu have a lot to offer. And so far, all of it at least thoughtful or better, great.


I've never noticed Feisty in Ohio before. Thx for stopping by Feisty and you're actually right on with what you said! Your mom's very smart!


Reply By: BakerStreetPosted: Thursday, July 06, 2006I think what one has to consider is that this isn't mean as an insult 90% of the time now. I have heard the 'n' word a handful of times in public in the last few months, and every single time has either been quote from rap music, or the Dave Chappelle show. I can't remember the last time I heard it said in racist terms.


Baker, what you say is absolutely true. There are some who do still take it as an offense whether it's done as an insult or not. As you said the situation that it's being said in these days are mostly not intended as an insult.




Reply By: alison watkinsPosted: Friday, July 07, 2006Some, not all, kids are so neive these days. You should hear some of the racial slurs that come out of the mouths of my elementary school kids. I don't think they know what they are saying half of the time. I hope the party was fun!!! MMM ice cream!



No I don't think they know what they're saying too. Sometimes they want to make an impression and look good to their other friends, you know, like they're 'with it'. I always tell my children not to say something unless they know the meaning of the words they use because they will end up looking stupid. My dad taught me that a long time ago and it stuck with me.


Yes, the party was great and the ice cream deeelicious! {Breyers' Dulce de Leche and Edy's toffee house cookie dough, which my daughter loves!}
Reply #21 from JoeUser Forums Top
You handled this unpleasant situation very well, FS.

And a belated Happy B-day to your girl.
Reply #22 from JoeUser Forums Top
Reply By: InBloomPosted: Friday, July 07, 2006You handled this unpleasant situation very well, FS.


Thx Rose!