Pet Life.....

from WinCustomize Forums

Entries in a Dog's Diary:

7 am - Oh boy! A walk! My favorite!

8 am - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9 am - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

Noon - Oh boy! The yard! My favorite!

2 pm - Oh boy! A car ride! My favorite!

3 pm - Oh boy! The kids! My favorite!

4 pm - Oh boy! Playing ball! My favorite!

6 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Mom! My favorite!

7 pm - Oh boy! Welcome home Dad! My favorite!

8 pm - Oh boy! Dog food! My favorite!

9 pm - Oh boy! Tummy rubs on the couch! My favorite!

11 pm - Oh boy! Sleeping in my people's bed! My favorite!

 

Entries in a cat's diary:

Day 183 of my captivity ...

My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.

They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while I am forced to eat dry cereal. The only thing that keeps me going is the hope of escape, and the mild satisfaction I get from clawing the furniture.

Tomorrow I may eat another house plant.

Today my attempt to kill my captors by weaving around their feet while they were walking almost succeeded. Must try this at the top of the stairs.

In an attempt to disgust and repulse these vile oppressors, I once again induced myself to vomit on their favorite chair. Must try this on their bed.

Decapitated a mouse and brought them the headless body in an attempt to make them aware of what I am capable of, and to try to strike fear in their hearts. They only cooed and condescended about what a good little cat I was. Hmmm, not working according to plan.

There was some sort of gathering of their accomplices. I was placed in solitary throughout the event. However, I could hear the noise and smell the food. More important, I overheard that my confinement was due to my powers of inducing "allergies." Must learn what this is and how to use it to my advantage. I am convinced the other captives are flunkies and maybe snitches. The dog is routinely released and seems more than happy to return. He is obviously a half-wit. The bird, on the other hand, has got to be an informant. She speaks with them regularly. I am certain she reports my every move. Due to her current placement in the metal container, her safety is assured.

But I can wait; it is only a matter of time.....
2,647 views 13 replies
Reply #1 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Reply #2 from WinCustomize Forums Top

Entries in a cat's diary

Day 183 of my captivity ...
My captors continued to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects.
They dine lavishly on...


(dock icon by Po' https://www.wincustomize.com/ViewSkin.aspx?SID=1&SkinID=10078&LibID=29 )
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Reply #3 from WinCustomize Forums Top
LoL... Arent Dogs just the *Best...Mine even eats cats..
Well, if he was allowed he would..LoL
Reply #4 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Thats so great Jafo . You have it hit head on the nail. I so have to email this to my mom .

Good read, good for a laugh.
Reply #5 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Jafo ..... my cat has just sent you a token of admiration....by snail mail of course...since upchucked hairballs don't pass well over the web.
Reply #6 from WinCustomize Forums Top
That was great... and so true..
Reply #7 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Yeah...us guys just love dogs...its the only thing dumber than we are.
Reply #8 from WinCustomize Forums Top
So WebGizmos believes dogs are dumber than humans....
Reply #9 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Loved it, and sometimes it seems true.
Reply #10 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Day 184: For some reason I'm in a metal box with a glass door. It's getting a little warm in here...
Reply #11 from WinCustomize Forums Top
So WebGizmos believes dogs are dumber than humans....


Sometimes I wonder Hank But then I remember...they "always" go for the fake throw.
Reply #12 from WinCustomize Forums Top
The Family Cat

The family cat, it died the day
That everybody was away.
When they got home, they were distraught,
Because it was an after thought

To check it, so they did not find
The furry corpse it left behind
Until it had been dead awhile.
No rub, no purr, no cheerful smile.

Though deeply grieved, they did not sit,
Instead they thought to bury it.
The woman dug the shallow grave,
The boy, one final farewell gave,

Then laid its lifeless body down
Into the damp earth, cold and brown.
The woman, bent to cover up
The cat, encountered one hiccup,

The overlooked forgotten sin,
Of rigor mortis setting in.
And though poor puss was unaware,
His stiffened tail stood in the air

In homage to the terminal;
A stark and forlorn sentinel.
The woman cried and tried in vain
To lay the cats tail down again,

Until so wracked with grief, and sick,
She wedged it 'neath a garden brick.
The boy was taken by a fit,
The woman first thought grief was it,

But on a closer look she found
Him laughing, writhing on the ground.
"You horrid child, your cat has died,
You shouldn't laugh at that!" she cried.

But still he laughed, hysterical,
He found her antics comical.
The woman, still to end her task
To put the cat to rest at last,

So angry with the boy that she
Attacked to job ferociously.
And muttered to herself the while;
What horrid boy could be so vile?

How could he err so callously?
To find such mirth in tragedy?
But still he laughed until he cried,
The woman hot and fuming tried

To finish planting puss away,
That done, she had some words to say.
"You stop that laughing now! You hear?"
She took the poor boy by the ear

And cracked him 'cross his curly dome,
"Just wait until your father's home!"
With that, she marched him to the house
To wait for her expected spouse.

That night the household would resound
With screeches, laughter, round and round,
The story swinging to and fro
From tales of mirth, to grief and woe

As one another did regale
The story of the dead cats tail.
But down the bottom of the hill,
A little mound of dirt there still,

With time and wind and weathering,
The garden brick's uncovering!

Oh may we never see the day
When earth and brick erode away,
Exposing such a grievous view,
Of resurrected tail anew!
Reply #13 from WinCustomize Forums Top
Can't say I like that 'poem' much at all.